"Love is the most fucked up drug of them all" I never really understood what people meant by this. Until now. You opened up my eyes, you let me see why people told me not to fall in love. I handed you the gun and you decided to pull the trigger. I was running away from you, heave rain started to pour, the wind started to blow from every side possible. "Anna!" you yelled. I didn't stop running, I just continued trying to get away from you. In the corner of my eye, I could see you trying to throw your clothes on. I bet it wasn't all too warm due to this heavy storm going on outside. 'Just a few more blocks' I thought, and then I'll be home. Then I'll be able to slam the door shut in your face. Suddenly I heard a loud thud. It was you. You slipped, once again you yelled "Anna stop running away!". Not this time, I thought, not again. I stopped running, breathing heavily I stared at you, a couple of meters away from me I scoffed at the sight. You made me so angry so why can't I let you be in pain. As the rain started to pour even harder, making it impossible for me to hear the words you were saying, and quite frankly I didn't care either. I got frustrated "I don't give a fuck!" I screamed. It felt like a thousand knives were stabbed into my heart from the front. Not even from the back, because with my eyes wide open I trusted you. You decided to make me regret it. I sighed, "I never want to see you again in my life," I said. I think you didn't hear, because of the howling wind. The wind picked my voice up and took it with him. I turned around and started running again. My clothes were soaking wet. My hair dripping, I just couldn't wait to get home and put on warm clothes. I could hear your heave footsteps behind me. They were getting closer, you were running faster. I sped up, I could not let you get close to me. Then finally, I reached home. My safe space. My hands were shaking, trying to get the door open so desperately. You stopped running when you were about 10 meters away from me. "Please Anna we-" I cut you off. "We'll see," I said as I then opened the door, walked into the house, and closed the door. My mom's head appeared from around the corner. "Hi, love," she said. I looked at her and sighed "Not now mom" I mumbled as I ran upstairs and changed into some cozy clothes.
Later, we both sat in the living room, reading our books. I could feel her look up at me sometimes, I felt that she thought I wanted to say something. I looked up occasionally too. Maybe she wanted me to talk. Maybe she wanted me to tell her why you didn't come in like you used to. And I might, for now, I just want to sit and read in the comfort of the aching silence.
