Free Falls and Second Chances

Chapter 2: New Home

We finished unloading all of my stuff after just a few minutes. May maintenance staff kasi na nagprisintang tumulong sa aming mag akyat ng mga kahong naglalaman ng mga gamit ko kaya di na kami nahirapan. Now we were standing in the messy living room, boxes piled up in the midst, habang hinihintay na dumating yung pizza na pina-deliver namin.

Nilibot ko ang tingin sa bago kong apartment. Simple lang ang interior nito but it looked good enough for me. Hindi kalakihan ang living room area pero may isang pandalawahang leather sofa na ito at may wooden coffee table pa sa gitna. May wooden TV stand din sa may dingding. Maliit lang din ang kitchen, may pandalawahang mesa, dalawang monobloc chairs, mini refrigerator, at built-in cupboards. What I loved the most was the bedroom. Bukod sa pandalawahang kama, maliit na side table, at built-in cabinet, may maliit na bookshelf din ito. A sliding door made way to the mini terrace outside, with a perfect view overlooking the busy highway and the metro. For an affordable price of 4,000 a month, excluding water and electricity expenses, sulit na din. Just needs a few decorating and repainting here and there and it'll be my perfect haven.

"Okay ka lang ba talaga dito, chi?" Tanong ni Kyla sa akin. Chi ang tawagan naming dalawa.

"Oo naman, chi. It may not be as spacious as Drake's apartment but nothing beats the feeling of having a place to call your own." I gave her a reassuring smile.

"Baka lang kasi di ka na nasanay nang mag-isa, eh."

"Nah, I'm good. Mas ayos na din to kaysa sa setup namin ni Drake dati."

Tinapunan ako ni Kyla ng mapagdudang tingin. "Sure ka na okay ka na? Like, emotionally?"

Tumango naman ako at nginitian sya ulit. "I am, yeah. I actually feel relieved to be finally done with him. Toxic masyado, eh."

The doorbell rang, interrupting our conversation. It was the delivery guy from Pizza Hut. Binayaran ko ang order at nagpasalamat.

"I don't really understand why you put up with him for that long. Harapan kang ginagago, eh." Kyla continued on as she bit into her food.

She never really liked Drake for me. Although nakasama sya sa amin mag-inuman for a couple times dati, halatado pa din na hindi niya gusto ang timpla ng ugali nito. Ni hindi niya ito halos kinakausap dati kahit nasa iisang mesa lang kami, except for occasional small talk, just to be civil.

"I dunno. Maybe because I just needed companionship? Haha. I guess we were never really in love sa simula pa lang, chi. It was bound to end din naman so I already expected this." I took a sip of my soda. "Just not like this, you know what I mean."

Nagkibit-balikat lamang si Kyla at nagshift na ang topic sa ibang bagay habang inuubos namin ang pagkain.

Rest day ko na kinabukasan kaya napagpasyahan na naming bukas na lang isagawa ang pag-aayos ng mga gamit at paglilinis ng unit. Kyla decided to sleep over para na din maaga kaming makapagsimula kinabukasan.

Tumambay kami saglit sa terrace pagkatapos naming kumain para magyosi. Mag-aalas otso na rin ng gabi.

"Ayos pala talaga yung view dito, eh no? Pang music video datingan." Natawa ako sa turan ni Kyla. Totoo naman kasi. Unobstructed ang view ng city lights sa kabuuan ng Metro Manila mula dito sa kinatatayuan namin. Lakas maka-senti. Lakas din makahatak ng sad but aesthetic feels. Ewan ko ba.

"May malapit ata na beer garden dito eh. Nom tayo? Pampatulog lang?" Pag-aaya ko na agad namang sinang-ayunan ni Kyla. Napangisi ako. Dali talaga nitong kausap, eh.

Nagpasya kaming lakarin na lang ang beer garden na iilang metro lang mula sa apartment building ko. Medyo maraming tao since Friday night, mabuti na lamang at nakahanap din kami ng magandang pwesto na medyo malapit sa mini-stage kung saan may acoustic live band. Tahimik lang kaming umiinom ni Kyla habang pinapakinggan ang kumakanta onstage.

Nasa piling ng iba ngunit ikaw pa rin. May nagmamay-ari na, ngunit ikaw pa rin. Mula sa pagsara, hanggang sa pagmulat ng mga mata, bakit ikaw pa rin?

Ugh. Autotelic's Ikaw. My all-time favorite.

I was already on my fourth bottle when he unconsciously crossed my mind again. Gio Vallega. Well this happens everytime naman ata. Within the last three years. Taena. In my half-drunken state of mind, I struggled to close my mind off the memories wanting to flood in once again. Di na dapat alalahanin, eh. Besides, the last thing I wanted was another drunken reminiscence of the person who.... Well, damn it. I just want an ice-cold beer to top off a long day. And I just came from a fckin breakup for goodness sake! So no.

Don't think about it, self. Just don't. Not now.

But maybe some other time.