Letter 1

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by sisi7eg

by sisi7eg

Dear S.G.G,

I don't understand what I did. You won't tell me. I may have said some things, but you did too. And I apologized. You did not. Yet I still want you in my life. I wanted our kids to play together and be friends. I wanted to go to college together and go to Europe. I wanted to see you happy. I wanted to make you happy. I wanted to support you, like you did for me.

But somewhere along the way you changed. You used to be the brightest person I ever knew. We had only had that one argument about that drawing in 1st grade. And we saw each other through our first boyfriends.

You got me through my first break up. And helped my mental health get better. You worried and cared for me. And I don't know what happened. You used to talk to me about your struggles. You used to give me advice. You and I were.... almost like something you hear about in the stories. But I guess not anymore.

Because now you won't answer my calls. I'm pretty sure you blocked me. And you don't take my emails well. You told everyone something that I confided you in. But you let your boyfriend insult me in front of your entire class.

And I'm up and down. Some moments I couldn't give a fuck. And others I feel like crying in a corner because you took something from me that wasn't yours to take. And if I could communicate how much you hurt me. I think you would hurt to. And look, I think about you all the time. And you occupy a large space in my mind.

You also are going to take up a large space of my next therapy session. I guess you're the new thing that's on my mind that I can't quite get out.

It hurts me every time I see your name. And remember how I fucked it up.

That it is my fault. If I hadn't just shut my mouth, like I always do, we would still be the best pf friends.

So I hope, like you said to me, that you find somebody who treats you better than you treated me. Because as far as I'm concerned, I wasn't the one who treated you poorly. Your boyfriend had all those rights, but you didn't listen then either.

And I doubt you'll listen to me now. So I'll just let myself out the back door of your life. I left the keys on your counter. I know you'll lock it up tight.

Goodbye from your ex best friend,

S.E.G

P.S I'll miss you.