trapped under your spell↠muke

17.No future, no life

✯No future, no life✯ 

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Michael Clifford dropped out of school. 

He was now homeless. He didn't hope for a future. He only hoped he died soon. 

He didn't even know what day it was. He now gets high most of the time.

He slept on random woman's houses. He was a male prostitute. That was how he earned some money, which was spent on drugs,alcohol and cigarrates.

He wasn't even eating. 

He changed his phone number so no one could contact him. 

He never showed up at Luke's.

He only left a note at his door. 

Which said: ''Goodbye''

He wonders if he even got to read it. Of course he didn't.

If he had enough money, he used it for tattoos. His chest was full of black flowers now. His right arm, the one with the rings, now was full with identical rings. And his left arm, the one with ''to the moon'' tattoo, was filled with words. Like ''hopeless'' ''dreamless'' and more. He called that arm the ''empty one'' because it described how he felt.

He dyed his hair red. He liked red. It was the colour he saw when he cutted his wrists.

He was punishing himself. Because he was an asshole to his father minutes before he passed away. He never, ever, told him something nice. Which made his father feel miserable all of his life. He deserved self-harm.

Sometimes he thought of killing himself. He had no friends left, no family left, no love left. There wasn't a reason to stay alive.

Then he remembered his guitar. The only thing Michael had with him was his guitar. Inside the case, there were some clothes, cigarettes, and drugs. It was the only thing he had.

He would sit down on the street and play it. In strange ocassions people would drop money on his case.

He felt miserable.

He missed Luke's touch. 

He missed Calum's asian face.

He missed Ashton's giggles.

He missed feeling alive.

There's no going back. Michael had no future, nor a life.