Fatherhood | drarry teen adoptive parents au

forty four | no show like war

a/n: i don't want to leave a note at the bottom of this one as it doesn't feel fitting. comment if it's confusing though, i meant it to read like a montage of snapshots (you'll see what i mean at the end) and it's meant to be a bit confusing. but comment thoughts, love as ever ❤️

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The first few days without Casper were overpoweringly numb and meaningless, and the boys saw no reason to get out of bed most of the time.

Hermione brought them cups and cups of pink tea, which had a soothing effect, though they didn't know exactly what she'd put in it, and Ron made sure to sneak them food from every meal he went to (which was all of them).

Sometimes they ate it and sometimes they didn't, too wrapped up in the grief and confusion of missing their baby to focus on anything else.

"It's like he's died already," Ron whispered to Hermione at more than one point in a hushed undertone. "It's only been five days!"

"It is a type of mourning that they're going through," she'd replied, "We just have to bear that in mind, and take care of them till they remember how to do it for themselves."

But despite their despair, not once did the boys seriously regret the decision they had made.

The stench of war hung heavy in the air and they knew that their newly 1-year old shouldn't be within 100 fucking miles of it if they could help it.

But it still hurt.

Harry's scar was causing him a lot of pain these days too, and it seemed that every night was filled with more nightmares than the last. They even filtered through into the day now; he'd be trying to read or have a shower, and suddenly there would be a vivid image of some new act of Death Eater cruelty playing out across his retinas.

It was getting hard for Harry to tell what was real; he'd even seen Mr. Weasley at one point but had been assured in a recent letter from Molly that Arthur was safe at home and any image of harm to him was (for now) fabricated.

He just hoped he wouldn't see Casper in one of these visions. He didn't know how he'd cope.

He didn't know how he was coping as it was. It was a very surreal experience, just waiting for the violence to bubble over in the Wizarding World, waiting to fight.

In a weird sort of way, Harry felt like the waiting was almost worse than a war. If there was to be the end of the world, he hoped it came soon. If he pulled another 'Boy Who Lived' move somehow, at least he'd get his baby back sooner.

He wouldn't have to wait long.

***

You want drama? There's no show like war. I'll give you blood and damage and trauma, a real show.

I'll give you broken sons and daughters, cheer for them now, please. A standing ovation as their bodies give out, a swelling chorus on the last breath.

Scene, change the scene! We've had bloodshed and misery for too long, replace it with violence and grief.

Or rage and destruction, or how about the boy that you love with his face all smashed in? How about your best friends screaming? Would you like to see that? How about your own reflection in broken glass? You're bleeding all over it.

Watch the show, don't get distracted. Spin around on the edge of the knife.

Your best friends are there again, with the boy that you love. It's exciting, isn't it? To wonder if they'll make it through. And that boy is fucking beautiful, even with blood all over his face, I'll give you that. Looks like one of God's own angels.

What about that baby you love so badly? He'll never have your lover's eyes, but you pretend that he does.

The time is now. Anger. It's cooling, isn't it? People think it's burning hot, but real anger is cold. It ices your soul right out of your human shell.

Dance, dance faster, do you want this so fucking badly? What are you afraid of? Does it kill you? Kiss death full on the mouth. Kiss your parents, too.

Your loves are dying, dance faster. Armies are dying, dance faster. You'll be watching this for the rest of your life. The war craves you so badly.

There's no show like war, and this is the best one yet.