Your love is my drug

Louis woke up the next morning with a throbbing head and dry mouth, he couldnt remember a thing from last night until little bits and pieces flew back into his memory, all that came to mind though were lots of beers, a little drugs, and a not so happy Liam. All louis could hear was the soft hum of whispers on the other side of the room… Liam and Niall. He groaned, lifting his head from the pillow and looking at the clock on his nightstand … 1:23 p.m

Fuck! Louis thought to himself, he quickly hopped out of the bed and instantly sat down again, he was sore all over. He didn’t know why, but it was enough to make him want to fall back asleep all over again. He groaned in pain and put a pillow over his face, and then he heard a quiet tapping on the door.

“what do you want liam?” louis said just loud enough for liam to hear but still too loud for the headache he had. At that moment, liam walked in the door smiling brightly at Louis. Louis couldnt stand how happy liam was when louis felt like absolute shit.

“How are ya feelin?” Liams smile dropped and his face was serious,

“How do you think Li?” louis turned over in his bed, so he was facing away from liam. he just wanted to be left alone until he felt better. Soon niall was walking into the room, holding a glass of water and two painkillers. Louis smiled at his friend then, happy someone was here to nurse him.

“Shit night lou?” Niall asked

“i dont even know, niall.” Louis tried to ignore liams disappointing looks, lou knew what he was doing wasnt right but it felt so good at the same time.

Louis sat up in his bed then, happily accepting the pills and drinking the whole glass of water in seconds.

“louis please let us help you, you need help!” Liam begged this time, every other time louis’ ‘problem’ was brought up, liam tried not to push, he would gently suggest that lou should see a therapist. Many arguments always popped up at the conversation, but this morning louis wasnt feeling like defending himself, he honestly felt broken. Not just physically, but more mentally.

“Mate i really think ya should,” Niall piped up this time, which he usually didnt do. The young lad would just sit in the corner, maybe nodding at liams words. This meant that last night must have been pretty bad.

Louis groaned at his friends, “dont act like ya never got high before niall!”

Niall blushed, opening his mouth as if to say something until liam cut him off,

“No louis, its different with you and you know it”

All louis could do was sigh, he’d used all of his defense, he had no other words left to say. “Guys just let me take a shower”

without another word being said, lou climbed out of his bed and walked directly to the bathroom, locking the door when he got in.

Louis slowly peeled off his clothes one by one, he wasnt even in pajamas, he was still wearing the clothes he wore to the party last night. Louis could easily agree he reeked, he smelled of alcohol and pot, which he didnt even do much of last night, it didnt do much to him anymore, he needed more than pot if he wanted a distraction.

When louis was naked, he looked at himself in the mirror for a few moments, not admiring himself, he almost felt ashamed. His hair looked disheveled, the bags under his eyes were very dark from lack of sleep, he looked tired and that was never good. His eyes slowly scanned down to his arms though, looking at the incisions where the needles hit his skin the night before. Louis smirked a little, tracing over the scars. He liked doing heroin. It made him distracted from everything, he liked how he felt, he felt happy for a few moments. He never winced when the needle entered his skin anymore, maybe all the nerves on his arms were dead, he didnt know. But he didnt plan on stopping.