A Glimpse of Yesterday

Part 1

Happiness? Struggles?Pain? Acceptance?

They say all of these are part of life. Like a roller coaster ride, no one knows what will happen, so savor the moment while it lasts. From having a life you wish to lose it in just a snap. Will Shanelle be able to win the battles of life or will she lose herself along the process? Here is the story of a woman facing the battlefield called life.

"Mom and Dad, this is for you. Thank you for being there, for always supporting me not just financially but most importantly,  loving me unconditionally. I couldn't ask for more. I will always bring with me the lessons and pieces of advice you instilled in me throughout my journey in studying. This diploma and achievements are for you. I love you both so much!"After that speech, I hurriedly went to my parents to hug them while mommy is teary-eyed while daddy is smiling.

"We love you too Shanelle, so much. Thank you for making us very proud", mommy said as she wiped her tears while daddy is kissing my forehead.

I feel so blessed and grateful to have a wonderful family and parents at the same time. At the back of my mind, I wish time will stop because I don't want this moment to last, my parent's arms, I feel so happy and contented.

Time flies by so fast. Now I am currently working as a nurse at the same hospital where my parents are working because they are doctors by profession.

"Hey baby, how's work?" mom asked while were having breakfast.

"Fine mom, a little bit tiring but I love what I'm doing, so I'll be okay," I smiled as I answered my mom.

"That's good to hear Shanelle," dad also added.

My job as a nurse is not easy but still, it is very fulfilling on my part to see my patients getting better. On the other side, I also can't contain my sadness whenever I have patients who are fighting for their precious lives and still didn't survive. Well, I guess that's how life works. We can't get all we want. We can't control everything around us for our interests. That is why I feel so lucky I got to live my life with my family beside me.

Everything is smooth and in place not until something happened...

"1,2,3 clear!1,2,3 clear!toot toot toot",and the line went straight.Time of death 6:53 Pm.

I just arrived home from the hospital when my uncle called.

"Yes, Uncle? Is everything alright? I asked as I answer the phone.

"Shanelle, I'm so sorry. We did our best. It didn't work. Your father is gone", my uncle said with so much sadness visible in his voice.

In an instant, my mind went blank. I drop the phone while my tears started to fall like a river with no end. My daddy has been diagnosed with having Coronavirus disease.

At first, I couldn't believe it but seeing my father fighting. It gives me hope that everything will be fine. But I guess I was wrong.

"Dad, why did you leave me? I asked as I stared at my father's picture frame in my room. I thought we'll have more time to spend together when this pandemic is over. I can't even mourn for you because of the situation. And it hurts me more knowing I can't see you for the last time. I continuously said as tears dripping all over my cheeks. I love you so much dad", I added before I close my eyes, hoping that this was just a dream.

Because never had I imagined losing my father...I was never ready. I think I will never be ready.

"Shanelle? Please let me come in". I woke up with a heavy feeling and a knock on the door with my best friend calling.

I lazily open the door, he hugged me tightly. And once again, I started to breakdown. All I want right now is a person who will stay on my side cause I don't know what to do anymore.

For the first time, I questioned God's decisions. Of all, why me? Why did he let this happen to me? Am I a bad person? How come he made me suffer like this?

Those questions are running on my mind while I'm crying.

"It's okay Shanelle. Just let it out. I will be here to be a shoulder you can cry on. I love you, remember that", he said as he cupped my face and kissed my forehead.

"Thanks, Stav for always being here in my dark times. I said as I hugged him tightly and I mean it.

" I'll be here as long as you need me. So please take good care of yourself", he added as he held me.

A few days later after my father's death, I was able to work because I know that many people need me, given that the virus is continuously spreading and rampant everywhere.

I can't help but cried and be sad at night whenever I remembered my late father because up until now, I can't accept the fact that he's gone.

A month had passed, another nightmare hit me. My mother who is a doctor passed away due to the same reason caused by Coronavirus disease.

As an only child who became very dependent on her parents, there are no exact words to explain how painful it is for me to know that I've lost them for the same reason.

Once again, my world turned upside down. How can life be so cruel? In just a snap of time, I lost my parents. My heart is shattered into pieces that I became suicidal.

"Mom, Dad,  it is so hard for me to accept that you are now gone. Those smiles, hugs, and kisses and all those moments we shared became a memory in an instant. I don't know what to do now. I want to die so I can be with you. I love you and please forgive me", the last words I uttered before all went black.

"Oh Shanelle, what have you done?"Stav's voice echoed in the hospital room when I woke up in the hospital bed one afternoon.

"Do you think that your parents will be happy knowing that you harmed yourself? Shanelle wake up! You are just one of those people out there who lost their family because of this pandemic. There are many people out there who need you, fighting their own battles to survive, and here you are losing hope? Please Shanelle, help yourself. This is not the end of the world, but the battle just began. I know it's been hard for you to lose your parents. I want you to be strong", and right there, I've realized so many things.

Life is short to be miserable. Don't let problems and trials hit you hard. Be strong enough to face the challenges you may encounter because it's one way of proving that you're better than those trials you're facing.

What Stav told me served as a wake-up call for me to not give up in life. I realized that this pandemic had changed my life. It brought so much pain and sorrow, yet one thing is for sure, it also made me who I am now.

A strong independent woman who was able to conquer the battles in life and ready to face any challenges life may throw.

I may lost my parents. But I will forever be grateful for the memories we shared in a short period of time. They will forever be in my heart, a place where they will remain for as long as I'm living.

There is no permanent thing in this world. Live your life to the fullest. Savor the moment before it becomes a memory. Treasure the moments you have with your family. We can't turn back time once it already passed, but we can give our time with them to bond and create more memories we can cherish till the end. Spend it wisely because once in my life, I've experienced "A Glimpse of Yesterday."

This is Shanelle Anne Del Mundo, and this is my story.

A Glimpse of Yesterday
The End