The Road Trip

Part One

The tissue is balled up in her fist as she stares numbly at the wooden box being lowered into the ground. Her eyes are dry and her mind clear. She vaguely hears her uncle saying something before people are offering their condolences. She doesn’t even remember replying to any of them. The last person trickles by so she makes her way to her car. She gets in and grips the steering wheel so hard her knuckles go white. She’s angry, not sad. Angry at him for leaving. Angry at him for not coming. Angry at both of them for keeping secrets and leaving her. She doesn’t bother telling her aunt where she’s going, she just puts the car into drive and disappears, out of the car park and as far away from the cemetery as possible. It’s not until she can barely make out the road lines that she notices the thick tears streaming down her face, she pulls over and for a long time she cries. She pulls out the old, crumpled photo and stares at it for a long time. First at herself, the blonde girl, a head shorter than her companions, grinning at the camera. Second, at the boy next to her, the one that shares the same warm, brown eyes but has a head of brown hair instead, his face showing that smile that has always been so full of unspoken secrets. And thirdly, she looks at the other boy beside her, his gap toothed smile, easy on his face, along with his blue-green eyes sparkling in the sunlight. She shoves the photo back in her wallet, trying to forget the past, knowing it will never be the same again. The old model Ford doesn’t object when she puts it into gear and slams down on the gas, heading straight for the one place that might give her at least a bit of clarity. It’s a windy night so she fetches her pullover from the backseat before getting out and climbing to the flat rock she spent so much time on growing up. She lies down and the coolness of the rock is refreshing against her back. The sky is clear and it’s easy for her to find all the constellations lurking amongst the stars. She spots the little dipper and before she can stop it or brace herself, a number of memories come flooding back. 

—

“Where are you going?” the blonde girl huffs, her arms folded across her chest, her eyebrows knitted together in frustration

Her brother Jack grins, that mischievous one of his “Nowhere you need to know of Kimmy”

She frowns deeper, if that’s even possible “It’s Kim or Kimberly, I’m not a baby anymore”

Jack scoffs “You’ll always be Kimmy to us no matter how old you get”

“Of course” his best friend Reece adds, that easy smile on his face, “We’ve been calling you Kimmy for as long as we can remember; nothing is gonna change that”

She rolls her eyes “You guys think you’re so amazing, well news flash you’re not, you still need to be home by sun down” with that she pokes her tongue out at them and waltzes away, leaving them to get up to whatever mischief 14 year olds get up too.

-

Both her brother and Reece have lost their goofy grins as they sit amongst the rows of people dressed in black. Kimberly can’t even bare to look up to the raised platform with the twin coffins so she opts to stare at her hands the whole time. When the service finishes her brother leaves. He just leaves. And she’s left with no one, no proper family. Well, until she feels a warm hand slip into hers. She looks to its owner and finds Reece, a grimace on his face as he watches Jack weave through the crowd towards the door. He stays with Kimberly the whole time, his hand never leaving hers. When they start towards the cemetery she looks up at him “Don’t you wanna go after Jack?”

He shakes his head and squeezes her hand tighter. Protectively. “You need me more right now”

They walk in silence and she realises he’s right, without him, without a rock, she would just break down and curl into a ball, shutting the world off in front of everyone. She squeezes his hand back in thank you, knowing words just weren’t enough.