The day before. (Kacchako)

chapter nine

Katsuki's pov

     I wake up, well more like snap out of my head. I've been up for a while now. Just staring at the ceiling, i do this a lot lately and i know why, I'm depressed i talked to my doctor and he sent me to this lady who diagnosed me with severe depression at high risk. Of well,you get the picture, they wanted to make me an impatient somewhere in japan far from here. But i wouldn't agree to go. I have a job to do, people to protect. I couldn't simply leave, but more then that i couldn't let Ocha see me like that.  I hate it, the wedding is so close and i still haven't told her I'm happy for her. The doctor said i have a crippling anxiety disorder and has me on some dumb pills but i didn't take them last night so I'll be on edge all day. I really should go to work i know that I'll be in trouble if i don't. I'm supposed to check in at 1:00 and its 8:00 now. I have some time to kill. I convince myself to get out of bed and shower.

    I go to the guest room and knock on the door. "Hey shitty hair, I'm gonna shower. So don't go to the bathroom fuck head." I walk to the bathroom and turn to the mirror. I look at myself. I'm in so much pain all of the time. My hair is worse then it usually is. The bags under my eye are getting worse. I undress myself and get in the shower. 15 minutes later i half ass brushing my teeth and put on some subtle makeup to hide my unhealthy bags. I find myself sleeping less and less. It's getting bad, i need help. I get dressed into some casual clothes i don't eat in my hero fit, i hate getting it cleaned takes to long. I don't usually eat in the mornings but Kirishima is here i don't want him worrying. I either forget in the mornings to eat or I'm just not hungry. I used to eat a lot for strength but a few months ago, it changed i stopped getting hungry my diet changed completely.

      I go to the kitchen and make eggs for me and Kirishima. I'm not a bad cook, when i do cook for people i usually go all out but i don't feel like it so eggs and toast is good enough for today. We eat and leave for our agency's. I feel weird cause i know I'm gonna see her. Augh that dumb pit in my stomach. Like butterfly's are being crushed to death. I get in kiris car and he drives me to the agency i look down at my phone and see i have a voicemail from ocha. I feel my heart flutter then sink to the bottom of the ocean floor why would she leave a voicemail for me is she mad at me or confused about my voicemail from last night where i was heavily drunk. I close my eyes tight and brace my ears for whatever she has to say.  I listen and laugh a little to myself at her cute antics but cant help to feel a little anxious over what she's gonna say. It sounded serious. We arrive and i say my goodbyes, Kirishima doesn't work for the number one agency he prefers to work along side mina. I assume he's heading to get her now. I take a breath before walking in the door.

Hii, Arthur kun here. Do you like the story so far? Idk is it going to fast i cant tell lol it seems like a long time for me because i upload so little. I've been having a rough time lately my depression got ahold of me for a few months but i always try to get something down. To be honest writing on here does make me anxious because i feel an obligation to post and be creative and make good stories and a good plot. I do like it when i see someone commented or voted and that always makes me want to write more. I'm just at a really bad point in my life rn my dysphoria is worse then ever because I'm finally letting myself think about a life where i am myself. I just hope you guys who read this don't lose interest because i never update it. Anyways i don't think i need to say this but it might be a while till i update next so im gonna recommend some good finished kacchako books for you.

Hero too: kacchako

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Caramel

Luke out