I Will Always Miss You (phan)

I Miss You

Dan’s Pov-

It’s been a year since I’ve seen you. Since I’ve heard your voice. Since I started hurting myself. I’m standing in front of your gravestone. I come once a week, if not more. I talk to you about everything that’s happened since the crash. I tell you that I miss you. Why did you have to go? It should’ve been me.

Since the crash, I’ve become depressed again. I started self harming. I’ve been talking a blade to my skin, been burning myself on the fireplace, been doing anything to get rid of the hurt inside my heart. I’ve shut everyone out of my life. I barely post YouTube videos, now. Instead, I just lay in bed, watching all the videos you have done, and that we’ve done together. I cry myself to sleep, and I have the same dream every night. But when I wake up, I realize it was just a dream, and that you’re still gone.

I don’t go on social media anymore. The fans keep asking if I’m okay, and I’m tired of faking that I’m fine. The only thing I go on, besides YouTube, is tumblr. I like to look through your blog, look through your tag, and look at edits of us. Sometimes I still hear you in your bedroom, but when I go to check, no one is in there. I sleep with Lion, I hope that’s okay. I wear your clothes sometimes, too. They smell like you, and that comforts me. Sometimes I can feel your presence beside me. Weather I’m watching our favourite anime, eating cereal, watching old videos, or just staring at the wall.

I will always miss you, no matter how much time goes by...