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ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ᴇɪɢʜᴛᴇᴇɴ ɪ ʙᴇʟᴏɴɢ ᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜ
I'd felt like this before. The return to normal after some horrific, out of the ordinary event. Then, I'd been confused. Now I had a sureness that scared me.
The tree had also become something like a home, somewhere where my heart lay, safe away from the dangers of pretending to live. It wasn't a coincidence that the contents of my daydreams had played wild there, with the twittering of the birds a familiar song in the background, going round and round, slightly crinkly as if it played from an old record.
The test I decided to conduct could be called absurd in many ways and genius in so many others. As I sat at the base of the tree, my surroundings seemed to sense it, accepting the challenge I was walking into, and soothed the wind across my cheeks, brushing like lips in a kiss.
I felt wholly calm. There wasn't anything inside of me that wanted to battle, to deny what I'd failed to admit for years, a century, more than. Labels had frightened me enough that I knew not to give them out now.
My feelings lay in the hands of chance.
If Alice came to me, then I would do it. I would find some way to tell her how much she meant to me, how much I needed her. Being apart had killed me so much more than I had realised. My immortality was the only reason I was still standing- the only reason I hadn't been condemned to suffer as Bella had. It had taken losing her necklace and racing to the Volturi, for me to realise it all.
Chance had deemed to praise me.
Alice ran near, stopping to walk the rest of the way to our tree, so as not to disturb the surroundings with the wind that whipped on her heels. She smiled as she saw me, and I wondered if she lightened when she saw me, as I did when I saw her. With a skip to her step, Alice wove her way to sit by the tree, her body flattening until she was laying beside me.
"I think you need a proper introduction into the family. One that isn't in a life-threatening situation," Alice said, starting the conversation, her head flat against the mossy ground.
I nodded briefly. "I'd like that," I said softly, shuffling to look at her. "Though any situation where we're in a room with Bella is life-threatening to someone."
Alice laughed. "Bella is an exception."
She didn't move around to look at me, not at first at least. Her eyes were sparkling as she looked straight up, eyes drifting across the canopy of branches and wide, fluttery leaves. Alice smiled, eyelashes leaning flatly against her cheeks.
"Have you ever noticed how much the forest sounds like a song?"
"Every time I'm here, I can hear it," I whispered, listening to the music she spoke about. "The stream is like a drum, the birds a singer."
She sighed contently, nodding.
"What would you call it?" I asked.
Alice finally turned to look at me, head leaning against her interloped hands. "Dreams," she said. "This sounds like the closest thing to a dream, doesn't it?"
I blinked, trying not to think about the pathways of my imagination that led us here once before. She couldn't know about those, surely.
"Do you think it plays just for us?" she said.
"I like that thought."
"Then we can't let it go to waste." Alice's hand outstretched to me as she moved to kneel above me. "Dance with me."
Alice pulled me to my feet, laughing as she did so. Then she stepped toward me, like something from a dream. Her hand drifted across my palm, drawing toward my elbow until she was pulling me in. I could feel the softness of her eyelashes against my cheek, my senses running wild as her bare knees brushed against my leg. The music of the woods began, a soft twinkle compared to the wildness of my thoughts.
I was suddenly aware of everything. Of every tiny detail of her face: the natural pout of her lips, the dimple that appeared on the side of her face as she smiled, of the lopsided raise of her smooth eyebrow. I was aware of myself, of how close I was to her, the feeling of her hand flat against mine, the absence of a beat of a heart that would have been running eagerly.
And I was aware of one single thing, most of all. I was undeniably in love with Alice Cullen.
"I've been waiting for this dance for a long time," she said, her eyebrows raising ever so slightly, challenging me to step forward. So I did.
"How long have I kept you waiting?"
"Since that afternoon in the forest, you touched my face when I was in the sun. I saw this moment here. And I've been waiting for it ever since."
I had to force myself to keep us moving, my mind going blank as the words spread across my body. I saw this moment here. It didn't feel real. But I felt everything she meant: the longing that had persisted for so long. The longing I had mirrored, standing just out of range of her touch. So I leaned in, watching my own fingers as they drifted across her glass-like skin until I met her gaze under lowered lashes.
"I apologise profusely." She shivered under the weight of my words, my breath, my look. "I promise to never keep you waiting again."
"Never?"
"Not as long as my heart isn't beating."
My lips were upon seconds, drawing her in and then pulling her out, like crashing waves and opposing currents, something spontaneous and natural and beautiful. And though it was tender, beneath it all, we could not hold back the need that had built up over months. The need to be closer, to reach deeper into ourselves, was desperate. Her scent was overwhelming, making my legs feel as if I could topple over at any moment.
It was as if those dreams were coming true. Her hands drifted across mine, edging to trail up my arm, against my shoulder, teasing the nerves at the base of my neck. I sighed against her lips. She kissed me, sweet lips hot against mine.
And there, as we shared that first moment, that confirming moment which I'd feared for myself for decades, enough to make me hide myself, enough to give me this gift, I knew one thing. Though we hadn't shared the words and were unlikely to do so for a long while, I knew that I would love Alice with all of my passion and strength. I would never stop- could never stop- loving her.
