Hayloft || dreamnotfound

IWY

TW: homophobic slurs, Mentions of ED, Cursing
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You make my head spin
I can't focus when you're around
You're always around to pick me up
I'll drag you down let go
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Heartbeat pounding against his ears he ran. He didn't know when it would end; the relentless torture. The feeling of being wrapped up in someone else's grasp. oh to be out there once more oh to be free.  Tripping, he dropped through the void arms flailing about before quickly being yanked into the dark.

A light? A small beacon of hope maybe there would be something here other than emptiness. He pulled the chain listening, quietly watching. A series of soft clinks and clanks rang out before the light flipped on.

Baffling was it?

His heart dropped to the pit of his stomach, a real dark fucking place. To some the sight before him would be nothing major.

Faggot

He clenched his sides the growing emptiness inside of him unbearable. The monster inside roaring into the silence.

Choking

His hand clamped over his mouth feeing the bile rise in his throat.

"You're disgusting" the voice called out "you think that by emptying your body of all that remains you'll suddenly become the talk of the town the horrid everyone dreams of?" His knees buckled beneath him, his knees colliding with the hard surface below him.

"Shut up" he croaked.

"This is no way for a man to behave. Quit acting like a sick teenage girl." He called out angrily

"Shut up."

"You're such a freak, a fucking fag, quit acting like a queer and forget these unnatural thoughts about your fucking body image. Men don't do this."

"SHUT UP, SHUT UP! SHUT UP!!!!" He shouted jolting out of his sleep.

"Clay?" His mother asked quietly pushing the door open. "Are you alright"

Clay didn't speak, he curtly nodded shoving his face in his hands as she slowly closed the door. He peeled away from the sheets grabbing his uniform and walking to the bathroom.
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"Hey cutie" he jumped when the feeling of a hand brushed against his lower back. he whipped his head around to meet George's eyes. The shorter boy smirked at him snaking his arm around his waist walking with him. His face flushed and he looked away.

"George- this is weird." He said trying to wriggle out of his touch, shoving his hands in his pockets. He knew if people saw they would talk and somehow word would get to his father. "guys don't do this, this is something you should do with your girlfriend"

George narrowed his eyes at him before grabbing his arm and pulling him out of the hallway into an empty classroom. "George wha-" he was cut off as George grabbed his shoulders pinning him up against the wall.

"Cut the crap." He started leaning in glaring at clay. "Don't think I don't notice you staring at me from across the courtyard or even during lectures" he removed one of his hands from clay's shoulder. "You can pretend all you want that you're all that you're talked up to be around the others but you can't with me." He said voice now hushed to a whisper. Clays face burned, he could feel the other's Chocolate eyes glaring holes into his face but he couldn't meet his eyes.

"Asshole, shut up. I'm not a fucking faggot you don't fucking know me. You're lucky I let some nobody fucking exchange student hang around me" he barked back voice dripping with venom. George stood there stunned for a moment before he quickly looked down. Clay was about to walk away when he once again was caught off guard by George shoving him into the wall. With an unrecognizable expression he pulled dream down to his level by his tie.

"You always know just what to say don't you" he spoke slowly, clay shivered feeling George's hot breath on his neck, he pulled away for a second laughing, George's faced was flushed as his laughter filled the room. "I know you want me clay." He said wrapping his arms around clay's waist pulling them closer. "You can put on your little tough guy act again. Tell me how you hate me, degrade me all you want but that doesn't change how you feel. Cause I know you're just an insecure little boy who needs to be shown what it's like to feel." He said pulling away from clay.

His fingers lingered on clay's hand before he pulled it to his mouth gently placing a kiss on his knuckles. His expression turned neutral as he turned to leave the room.

He was pulled back. Clay's left hand weaved not George's hair his other snaking around his waist as he leaned in whispering in the other boy's ear.

"I want you" he said desperately.

"I know baby boy."

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Word count: 842