The feeling is heart stopping. The thought that any minute, there could be a foetus of metal buried beneath my chest.
I've been running for so long, I feel like every bone in my body is broken, with the rudder of my fractured collar-bone, my lung punctured, the hinge of my lower jaw blown, so nothing is binding my mouth together. My head is thumping so hard it is like an unexploded bomb ticking. Tick-tock.
It's only been a while since I last rested. Only a week, which is nothing really. I've tried to run during the deeply grazed days of winter and rest during the scoulding days of summer, sweating so much I could almost drown myself.
I was lucky my fingers didn't drop off with the amount of hurt caused by the frost bite. I longed for the time when the days were not widened and it was not close to winter.
I had to climb day and night but made myself think I was just having the chance to explore.
The silk skirting of the bed linen I've been hiding under for the past three days is starting to feel like a collapsing mine. But hopefully it's only a phase, as it started off passionate but just makes a frozen river which runs down the surface of my ribs from the tears that come from the back of my mind whilst I remember the perfect picture of the intimate nights I wish I could only make come around again. After all it was the only thing I used to actually attend along with my occasional betting session. That's the reason I can no longer rest only scan the source of everyday life, I wish I could trace back again.
I closed my eyes and traced back the face of my one true love who I had been forced to leave. Her porcelain damaged heart reminded me of the times we would walk down the street and hold hands and she would say to me," handle with care, I'm fragile", and we'd look deep into each other's eyes.
In the distance out of the corner of my eye I could see a parachute which also reminded me of my love and the time we went parachuting and that day we shared our first kiss.
I could hear something rattling in the bush near me, fist tightened, thumb tucked in ready to pounce. "Come" I shouted, finally managing to shout over the pain from the scarring of where my shoulder-blade had stuck out from the search that comes before death but after survival.
Every nerve in my body was tense now and only then could I bind the struts of two and two together and climb the rungs of my mind to realise I had not long left to live.
I had a feeling in my side which felt like a bullet had just been shot at me. But it couldn't have been, not yet! At that moment I fell to the floor and it occurred to me I had just been killed.
