The Phantom Detective ✓

Chapter 10: What Friendship Is

WENDY

SOMETIMES, I would stare at my classmates while they were laughing together, hanging out with each other, and befriending one another. In most every time I think about it, I feel like something heavy had became a part of my internal body that burdens my heart. Sometimes, I wonder why can't I be like the other students. Why can't I have some real friends? Is everyone a fake? A hypocrite? Or was it me?

Hindi ko alam kung kailan nagsimulang kumalat ang title kong cursed doll. Hm, siguro noong elementary pa ako dahil mahilig ako noon magdala ng mahika sa school. Nasa highschool naman ako nang simulan akong iwasan ng mga estudyante dahil sa bad luck na dala ko.

Iilang tao rin ang sinubukan akong kaibiganin sa umpisa pero bigla nalang nila akong iniwasan matapos silang maaksidente o ma-involved sa crime scene. I've almost fallen into depression whenever I think about them. But now that I'm in senior high, I care less about the significance of friendships.

"Nnnn, nakaka-excite panoorin ang laban n'yo sa fencing mamaya!"

Walking with Sophie in the hallway had gained me more attention than usual. Whose attention wouldn't be caught, anyways? A granddaughter of a billionaire is walking with an outcast that brings unfortune to the people around her.

"Wala akong alam sa fencing pero ichi-cheer kita. Go, Wendy!"

"Thanks."

How pitiful of me to wonder about how many days are left before Sophie leaves my side. Not that I'm looking forward to, it is just the results of every cycle. Indeed, I am a girl worth leaving for.

"Hindi ko talaga maintindihan kung bakit ganito ang mga students dito sa Percevale. Ayaw nila sa 'yo. E, ano bang nakakatakot sa 'yo? Honestly, you look like a cute doll."

I don't wanna entertain her ideas. Those are just plausibly the ways she can think of to start friendship. Nanatili lang akong tahimik na naglalakad habang pinakikinggan ang mga sinasabi niya.

"Nnnn, Wendy. Hindi ko rin maintindihan kung bakit ayaw mong ipakita sa kanila na mali sila ng iniisip tungkol sa 'yo."

I glanced over my shoulder. "Ayokong magsayang ng oras sa mga close-minded. I don't want to punch the air and only realize my efforts were in vain later."

"Ang tanong, have you tried to?"

"Yes," sagot ko.

Totoo, sinubukan kong patunayan na normal na student lang din akong kagaya nila. But even so, I'm fate's favorite disaster girl. What they knew—I bring bad luck—is true. So I never did the best I could. The outcome is already set in stone, why bother giving your all?

Siyempre, hindi ko sasabihin kay Sophie ang gayong pangangatwiran. Paniguradong may pang-comeback siya roon.

"My, my. I don't understand them at all," sabi niya nang nagsasalubong ang kilay.

"Hindi rin kita maintindihan," wika ko at itinuon ang pansin sa nilalakaran namin. "Why are you hanging out with me? Haven't you heard about me giving troubles to every one I came across with? What happened to Zen and Kentonni is a given proof."

"That is entirely not your fault." She paused for a while. "When I transferred here, the cursed doll thingy is the first thing I've learned. Dahil sa curiosity, nakakalap ako ng mga major information tungkol sa 'yo. Na-realize ko kung gaano ka ka-lonely—iniiwasan ng mga tao, walang kaibigan, walang—"

Huminga nuna ako nang malalim bago sumagot. "Sophie, I can live without your pity. Save it for others."

"Nnnn, no! Hindi sa naaawa ako sa 'yo," bulalas niya habang kumukumpas pa ang dalawang kamay. "You know, Wendy. Alam ko ang pakiramdam ng pagiging outcast. I've been one, or I can say I'm still one. I know how it feels. So if I have the chance, I won't let others feel that way. It's suffocating—like how a poison had gone throughout your body."