I'm an idiot. I can't do anything right. Nobody can trust me. I'm such an forgetful moron. I promise to do ONE thing, I screw it all up. My mom doesn't trust me anymore, I don't blame her. Maybe if she tries to understand, It will get better. Heh, it won't happen. I'm so delusional. Whenever I find someone I trust, I get banished from talking to them. Why does this keep happening? What did I do to deserve this? I tought I was a good person, but apparently, I'm not. Guess I'll never be understood. Don't even mention a therapist. Can't afford one, aren't allowed to get one. Maybe It is all in my head.. Maybe it is the internet .. Maybe it is because my mom is too nice. Maybe my mom is right. God, I'm such an embarrassment, a disappointment. I'm not what my mom wanted. No matter how much she says I am, I know she's lying. I know she wanted a daughter who's smart, social, mature, pretty, who doesn't use internet, doesn't have a phone, has friends and is mentally ok. Instead, she got the opposite . Lazy, ugly, anti - social, uses internet too much, doesn't have friends, mentally not ok. First my dad betrayed her, now me? Gosh, could I be more selfish?
