The color blue, the sky, the ocean, blueberries, pansies, your eyes. The brightest blue I had ever seen was your eyes so full of happiness and light as if they had never seen pain or hurt in the world. I'll never forget your eyes.
Growing up almost every girl wanted a pony or a barbie doll, but what I asked for from the time I could talk was a brother. Someone that was family but also a best friend, someone to talk to when nobody was there, someone who would always be there. When I was 3, my mother told me she was pregnant and having a boy. That was definitely the second-best day of my life. Coming in First place was the day he was born, I remember seeing him for the first time and seeing his beautiful bright blue eyes. From the day he got home from the hospital I wouldn't leave his side. I taught him everything. How to walk, talk, read and write, of course to the best of my ability given I was only 3 years older. Mother put me in school a year later than I was supposed to, so I would only be one grade ahead of my brother. He really liked this, especially in middle and high school cause I kept my projects from previous years.
Most siblings slowly grow a hatred for their other siblings, but we never did that, we were always very close. I remember the many adventures we would go on. We both had very active imaginations, fighting pirates and Hiding from scary ghouls out to get us. We always played in the woods behind our house, being wild adventurers we were, we never stopped. We even played in high school when it would be considered childish.
We weren't like other kids sneaking out to go parties and such. My favorite memory of my brother was one night when it was pouring rain, we waited until mother was sleeping and we snuck out my window, we ran and ran slipping on mud and laughing. We were probably out there for an hour or two when we both decided we were freezing and went back to the house to find our mother making hot chocolate. "Thought you'd be back soon, come warm-up" she said. I remember thinking about how cool of a mom she was to know we were safe. We tried to hold on to every piece of childhood we could, knowing that soon there would be no sneaking out in the rain or fighting off pirates. There would be bills and jobs and no time for play only work, at least for me.
I wish it hadn't happened. I would have rather you had to pay bills and work, but I know you got to live your life happily and free never with a worry. The worst day of my life was when it happened. We were playing in our treehouse we were much too big for, I had insisted it would hold us. If only I hadn't insisted on it. You would still be here and we could be pretending our bills were a toll to the king or our bosses were pirates we had to fight off. The fear I had seen in your eyes when the treehouse started to fall was unfamiliar. My brother, the most fearless boy I had ever met, scared? Everything went black and I woke with a sharp pain in my leg. I looked next to me and saw my brother with a large piece of wood coming through his stomach. I quickly got closer and tried to wake him yelling for help. He was so quiet, so weak, he wasn't my strong brave brother then. He was scared, I was scared. I felt like I was yelling for hours when my brother finally shushed me and that's when I finally looked into his eyes. They weren't bright blue and full of happiness and light, they were dark full of sadness and pain. I laid with him listening to him breathe "I love you" he whispered before becoming silent again. Not just with his words, everything was silent, he wasn't breathing. I looked into his eyes once more before closing them, his eyes weren't full of happiness and light, they weren't even full of sadness and pain. They were empty. I slowly closed my eyes too.
I woke in a hospital. I had apparently broken my leg and got a really bad concussion. My mom found us. She doesn't speak of that day she won't ever. I try to remember his eyes sometimes and rarely I can. But I mostly see his eyes when they weren't full of happiness and light. I see the sad, painful, empty eyes but still, the color blue will always be my favorite color.
