Emison LOVE ME LIKE YOU DO

Emily Catherine Fields

Airport  - waiting area

"Hey Em, can you stay still for like one minute, I think I got dizzy just looking at you walk back and forth" Hanna pleaded. I've been walking around for 1 hour non-stop. Trying to get myself to calm down.

"Sorry Han, i'm just really excited to see her, it's been 3 years." I took a seat next to Aria.

"It's okay Em, we are all excited to see her. Aria touched my hand. 

"Yeah, I can't believe she came back for our senior year, just imagine how much fun this is going to be" Spencer added while she sips her coffee. We still have an hour to kill before her plane arrives. I got lost in my own thoughts. Few days before she left for Paris, we had the chance to talk in her tree house, I cried so hard and begged her not to leave and she pulled me into a hug, she said she'll be back every summer and that we'll text everyday. I told her I was afraid that she'll forget us and find new friends in Paris, she touched my cheeks and pinched them, "Oh Em, you are so sweet, even if I find new friends, you are still going to be my favorite" I didn't know I was gay then, but I know what I feel for her is something different than the other girls, I looked into her eyes and placed my hand in her cheek and pulled her closer, I knew it was wrong but for me it felt right, our lips met, we kissed for I don't know how long, until she  pulled away and smiled, "Now that is the best send-off gift ever, don't worry Em if I ever did find a boyfriend in Paris and he tells me I'm a good kisser I'll tell him I have a good teacher." then she kissed my cheek. "Let's go, I need to see the girls and say goodbye, we'll leave early tomorrow" she offered for me to take her hand. She acted as if the kiss didn't happen, like when we first kiss in the library, I thought she felt something then she told me it was practice for the real thing. I was left confused and lonely.

We meet at Spencer's house that afternoon, we cried and laughed and reminisced about the great times we spent together, but I couldn't get the kiss off my mind. I thought there was something wrong with me, I think I loved her more than just a friend. I was so confused because I was dating Ben that time, a year after, I came out as gay, I was so afraid to tell her so I confessed to the girls how I really felt about her. I couldn't ask for better friends, they accepted me for who I am. We never brought up my feelings for Ali in years, maybe I don't have that same feelings for her anymore, maybe I just love her as a friend now.