We monitor our words before they leave our mouths..
We never speak before we get to judge our selves..
The reasons being fear of sounding dumb and doubt,
We're afraid of others judgement so we judge ourselves..
You see if I can judge my thoughts.
Before their spoken to all,
Then I can stop myself from saying stupid things that are wrong.
So my words are always filtered with a fear stitched cloth.
In other words, I'm not myself because I live in a facade.
I don't feel as I did when I was young.
So full life, full of wonder, full of love.
I'd spend entire days of fun, under the sun.
And now I lay behind some walls wondering if I should get up.
I feel sad when I let myself just sit,
Inside the feeling that's within,
And when I don't choose to suppress.
I-have-found-that-I-have-many
add-ic-tions.
Entertainment of all forms are like a Needle in my skin.
I eat sugar, salt, and garbage,
Processed nonsense, holy shit.
I eat it to suppress, and that was hard for me to get.
It's not easy to admit,
I'm like a junky for a fix,
Of television, candy, marijuana, games with all my friends.
They take my mind so I don't feel what is inside.
There's a sadness that is new , I wasn't born with my God..
I am far from who I was, and I am far from who I am.
The person I've become is nothing more than just a sham.
