Risotto needs sleep. Okay so I'm writing a crackfic because I've been having a lot of writers' block lately for my one shot book (go leave a request if you have one) and I've heard stuff like this helps. This is going to be in an AU where none of them died and they team up or something idk. I don't own JoJo's Bizarre Adventure or any of the charcters or memes used in this book. N e ways, drink some water.

In a fast attempt to save her own ass, (Y/n) becomes the personal chef for the boss and his handy men, sometimes able to accompany them on missions in return. Though, it begins to seem like la unita starts to grow a soft spot for this pretty little chef, though the latter is oblivious to their advances. juggling cooking, mafia work, and the burden of being cioccolatas amusement is not as easy as it seems, but (y/n) manages to make it look like a piece of cake! (i havent seen any la unita speciale x readers so here we are :/) -jjba is not mine, though the stand, plot, and any added characters are.- -cover art is also not mine #1 IN SECCO 12/11/2020

Unsure of how to handle herself after being replaced at the nightclub she once conquered, the infamous singer, (y/n) (l/n), otherwise known as 'The Radio Star', finds herself mindlessly going around and using the worst coping mechanism possible to deal with her waves of depression... Which is, understandably, murder. after being booted from 'The House of Songs', (y/n) noticed that her singing had acquired a rather strange ability when listened to. those who happened to listen to even a single note that lasts longer than five seconds, begin to slowly crinkle, then once under enough pressure, burst open. however, she was not the only one to notice this, as another has kept their eye on her as well. will a high-class singer stoop so low as to join a mob, or will she keep her dignity and continue as she is?

Paradise is only paradise to those who've never tasted the bite of its sword. Can you survive on an island before it swallows you whole, or will you fall victim to ones of its inhabitants charms?

Risotto is literally about to die from the braindamage

The villains trashed a casino and now they have to pay for it, however they can. JJBA is not mine, but any original characters, the plot, and all non-canon events are. For #1 in kira (9/23/20) 100k ~~ JAN - 11 - 2023

Nobody's ever heard of a blind nurse, and quite frankly, no one would want to be a patient to one. The idea itself is ludicrous! So... Why did La Squadra employ one?

...and other shenanigans. Youve been hired as a dogsitter by some doctor named Cioccolata. He didnt tell you anything about the dog, or about the house, or the freaks living in it. This is your story *law and order sound*

Nothing like getting chased by living statues in the middle of the night to get your blood pumping! We've got one's trying to kill you, we've got some that want to be your friend, and then we have... Gappy! He doesn't know what he's doing, but he's trying his best. Will the museums new nightguard, (Y/n) (L/n), be able to survive those of stone and wood? We'll just have to find out! (gender-neutral insert so everyone can enjoy reading this fic:)) (credits to the cover belong to popurin) #1 IN MILESTONE 8/1/21

In which a highly feared mafia boss and a few of her subordinates become highschool teachers. meet (y/n), a self defense teacher at a local highschool. having recently been attacked and outnumbered by a rival gang that invaded their area, (y/n) and her right hand man, kakyoin, flee the scene and try to blend in with the residents of the town, finding themselves employed at a nearby highschool. to their surprise, three of their subordinates had found themselves at the school as well, unaware that their employer was working along side them. after all, (y/n) did keep her identity hidden from everyone, even to kakyoin. now, what happens when one of the lackeys is a traitor? will (y/n) be able to unearth the mole before it becomes her undoing? even more so, what happens when the mole is one of the subordinates working at the school?