What if you go to the store, hoping to find your condiment for food? What if its more than just a sauce? What if you come home to something you never wanted to see? That's what happened to Y/n. (Y/n means your name, and will use neutral pronouns so they/them) (This is a joke fic, meant for my friends. She said, "NEXT THING YOU KNOW THERE'S GONNA BE A SOY SAUCE X READER OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT " so. That's why I am here, I can't find any.) (also, I am dyslexic so hang with me.)

Jesus frick

About three things I was absolutely positive. First, the hot guy's name was Farquaad. Second, there was a part of me that wanted him to farq me. Third, onions. Shrek X farquaad :) K this story might be a joke but Shrek definitely isn't.

Shrek is a struggling artist. A poet to be exact. Then he meets the dreamy woody who turns his life around. *smut* With special guest Guy Fieri ~ highest ranking: #1 in the shrek tag!

Shrek is living with Fiona and his uGlY kids. Shrek is not satisfied with his life anymore. Until one day, everything changes.

!! I MADE THIS WHEN I WAS LIKE 12 BEWARE !! A fat ogre and a fat bee meet up and fall in love, shit happens, read. this shit has older humour than my nan christ