I pace back and forth, Luke staring up at me from the couch with a hurt and desperate look in his eye. He needs answers. He needs to know the truth and he wants to know. He wants to know why i've blocked him out after nine years of being so close. He wants to know why i've become so isolated from the world. "Ashton, please.. Please I can't live like this anymore! I need you, I need my best friend back!.." He cries out in exasperation, a single tear rolling down his slightly pale face. "L-Luke, you don't understa-" "You're right Ashton. I don't. So make me understand! Help me understand.. I just want to help you, please.. " Little did this poor 17 year old Australian boy, know, that he cant help me. He cant fight this storm, swirling into a black cloud of pure hatred and love inside of me. " You cant help me.. " I respond softly. " See, there it is.. The assumptions, Ash you cant.. you cant just keep doing that.. I want to at least try- Let me be here for you.. " He shakes his head, as if he's on the verge of falling to floor and breaking down, right here in front of me. " Luke I can't let y-you, j-just stop.. " "Ashton- " "I c-can't, please stop!.. " " No! Ashton I was hurt, alone, scared and in desperate need of you by my side, yet you weren't.. Why?! Why are you avoiding me! Why are you avoiding the world! Fucking Christ, what are you so afraid of-?!" He cries, standing up quickly. " I'm in love with you dammit!.." I instantly yell out. I look up at him, my eyes watering but holding back the urge of letting any tears fall. I had to take a minute to comprehend what I had just screamed out at him. Although I understood quite well, what I had said. And I understood that what I had just said, I meant. I speak softly and gently, as my voice comes out in a small quiver. " I'm in love with you, Lucas.." And this, my friend, is where I knew.. I had completely. And totally. Fucked up.

I am Ashton Irwin . I'm in a band . We do weird stuff . And I like someone I shouldn't . I don't think he will take the news well . Yeah, you read right . He .

"Well I guess it's just tough love isn't it"

"Fat fat fat," Luke clawed at his body. "All I am, is fat." - Luke Hemmings is ugly. Luke Hemmings is fat. Luke Hemmings likes to puke. Luke Hemmings despised eating. Luke Hemmings is every negative comment made about him. Luke Hemmings is gay. Luke Hemmings is pretending. Luke Hemmings is damaged goods. Ashton Irwin is hot. Ashton Irwin is skinny. Ashton Irwin loves to eat. Ashton Irwin is smart. Ashton Irwin is amazing. Ashton Irwin is everything Luke needs. Ashton Irwin is gay. Ashton Irwin is pretending. Ashton Irwin is noticing. Ashton Irwin is falling in love.

Luke and Ashton used to be best friends, until Ashton moved away. They promised that they will meet again one day and be best friends again. What happens when one day Ashton comes back and seems like Luke doesn't remember him anymore and thay start to hate each other? Will they be friends again or is it already too late? A Lashton fanfic. Contains bad language, self-harm and drinking.

Ashton has been bullied and beaten at school and at home. All he did was put flowers in his hair and like boys. Luke was a jock with a secret passion for punk rock music. Luke is gay but no one knows that yet. He just sits and watches as his three friends abuse Ashton. Ashton likes Luke and Luke likes Ashton but that's information that neither of them know (yet). Luke has been closeted for a while but Ashton just came out to his family and friends. He used to be popular but now that he came out he's the complete opposite and even his closest friend Michael has become distant.

Luke is the new kid at school he already knows his sexual orientation. Ashton has lived I'm the same town his whole life. He isn't so much sure of what he is. When ashton is asked to show Luke around the school he does and they become very close very fast. (mature content)

Preview.. While I was walking home I accidentally ran into someone "Watch where your-" the person paused as I looked up to see who it was. It was Luke. "S-Sorry" I stuttered looking back down at the ground "It's okay, aren't you suppose to be walking home with that friend of yours? Paige was it?" he asked "Yeah but, she's hanging out with someone right now so she can't" I replied "Oh, then I'll walk you home" Luke replied. "You really don't have-" he cut me off "Don't be stupid, it's dangerous to walk alone in this time of day" he replied "O-Okay.." I stuttered as we both started walking to my house. When I made it to my house Luke said bye & I did too then quickly went into my house, then my room & hopped onto my bed with a normal expression then happy expression. "I walked home with Luke.." I said to myself with a huge smile on my face as I slowly started to fall asleep.

"I use cutting as an alternative to committing suicide. The blood reminds me I'm alive, and it's oddly comforting. It's my only escape from this hell." WARNING: triggers like self harm are a common occurrence in this particular fan fic, also there's swearing, if that bothers you haha