★... the shit show is here !
12 stories
The Art of Self-Love (and shoving a crystal dildo up your ass) by -cxothicol
The Art of Self-Love (and shoving a crystal dildo up your ass)
-cxothicol
  • Reads 1,265
  • Votes 22
  • Parts 2
POV: you decide to treat yourself to a self-care day and fill yourself with positivity and self-love 💗 (it's all wholesome until you realize that y/n is going to do that by fucking a rose quartz dildo) another awful traumatizing shit post brought to you by famel bob productions.
Warm Ass Papaya is the new WAP by -cxothicol
Warm Ass Papaya is the new WAP
-cxothicol
  • Reads 793
  • Votes 20
  • Parts 3
in which y/n is exposed to dangerous curiosity and sinful temptation by a papaya. later engulfing in his dark twisted desires. based on (hopefully not) true events. ──────────────── 🏷️... → author's note: as most of my books this ends in food porn. enjoy another traumatic reading experience provided by me, Famel Bob.
carrot theifs and carrot fuckers by -cxothicol
carrot theifs and carrot fuckers
-cxothicol
  • Reads 738
  • Votes 26
  • Parts 1
[ warning: EXPLICIT SEXUAL CONTENT ] SUMARRY: life is short, might as well... steal a carrot and shove it up your ass in the walmart restrooms? ──────────────────────── 🏷️... → author's note: another short story (these are fun to make) because i'm bored and i still haven't updated any of my other books. enjoy!       , famel bob ! ✩
Fuckable-Looking Bagels Are My Favorite by -cxothicol
Fuckable-Looking Bagels Are My Favorite
-cxothicol
  • Reads 816
  • Votes 32
  • Parts 2
❝ listen, i don't have a food kink or anything of that sort but... i really, really wanna fuck that bagel right now. ❞ ❝ bro wtf ❞ ❝ it- IT JUST LOOKS SO... SO FUCKABLE ❞ ─── IN WHICH , , ,   y/n fucks a very good looking bagel (and then eats it) ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ story by: @-cxothicol ↳ ꒰🏷️꒱ STATUS: [ 𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗣𝗟𝗘𝗧𝗘𝗗 ] 🍃 ... → author's note: no i will not apologize.
Thanksgiving Is Fucked! (literally) by -cxothicol
Thanksgiving Is Fucked! (literally)
-cxothicol
  • Reads 2,360
  • Votes 77
  • Parts 4
y/n has a dick. y/n fucks the thanksgiving turkey. thanksgiving is fucked (literally) thanks to y/n. happy thanksgiving!                      featuring: a 'i'm fucking                   done with this job' narrator credit to my friends during lunch for idea.
NAUGHTY SPIRITS AND SEXY PUMPKINS by -cxothicol
NAUGHTY SPIRITS AND SEXY PUMPKINS
-cxothicol
  • Reads 1,485
  • Votes 40
  • Parts 7
Halloween. Oh Halloween~! Wonderful Halloween. What could possibly be more lovely than... aesthetic murder, haunted houses, dancing skeletons, Trick or Treating and... naughty spirits, and sexy pumpkins ???! Well well well... this sure does seems interesting! IN WHICH,          Y/N loves Halloween! But this Halloween proves to be quite special and is not as any other Y/N has ever had (If helping a ghost find who he was in his past life counts). Oh well-! ──────────────────────       ❝ AUTHORS NOTE ❞ ─ happy Halloween my lovely readers! in honor of spookie season i have taken the honor to write this semi-short story and traumatize you all by sharing it. yay!! please enjoy. with much love,               famel bob ! note: discontinued! oof
[  𝐓𝐎𝐔𝐂𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐒𝐒 !  ]  grass x reader  by -cxothicol
[ 𝐓𝐎𝐔𝐂𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐒𝐒 ! ] grass x reader
-cxothicol
  • Reads 5,554
  • Votes 131
  • Parts 3
𝐓𝐎𝐔𝐂𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐒𝐒 !                    ❪ grass x fem! reader ❫ ❝ go and play with the grass. maybe it cures your horniness, wack ass hoe 。❞ 𝗜𝗡 𝗪𝗛𝗜𝗖𝗛,          a teen who is down bad is convinced by their best friend to go touch some grass. and they do - or something like that. ──────────────────── written by: @-cxothicol       ↳ ꒰🏷️꒱ STATUS: [ 𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗣𝗟𝗘𝗧𝗘𝗗 ]
THE FREE ICE CREAM TRUCK by -cxothicol
THE FREE ICE CREAM TRUCK
-cxothicol
  • Reads 970
  • Votes 76
  • Parts 7
❛ 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝙁𝙍𝙀𝙀 𝙄𝘾𝙀 𝘾𝙍𝙀𝘼𝙈 𝙏𝙍𝙐𝘾𝙆 ━━━━━━━━━━         ━━━━ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ sᴜᴍᴍᴇʀ ɪ sᴛᴏʟᴇ ᴏɴᴇ ᴛᴏᴏ                    ╰─ 𝗜𝗡 𝗪𝗛𝗜𝗖𝗛,           in a hunt for the mysterious free ice cream truck, a very stupid and impulsive teen gets into a shady van because it said 'free ice cream' ❝ SO... WHERE IS THE ICE CREAM?! ❞ ❝ THERE IS NO ICE CREAM, THIS IS A KIDNAPPING ❞ ❝ THIS IS A FUCKING SCAM, I WANT MY ICE CREAM ❞ inspired by, that one awesome math teacher i had in 8th grade <3 ──────────── written by: @-cxothicol     ↳ ꒰🏷️꒱ STATUS: [ 𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗣𝗟𝗘𝗧𝗘𝗗 ]
𝗖𝗢𝗙𝗙𝗘𝗘 𝗧𝗔𝗟𝗞.  [elmo x reader] by -cxothicol
𝗖𝗢𝗙𝗙𝗘𝗘 𝗧𝗔𝗟𝗞.  [elmo x reader]
-cxothicol
  • Reads 2,386
  • Votes 76
  • Parts 7
let's talk about coffee and our troubles                 ❪ human elmo x reader ❫          ❝ a penny for your thoughts? ❞ ❝ hmm how about a coffee instead? ❞ ❝ deal. ❞ ╰─ 𝗜𝗡 𝗪𝗛𝗜𝗖𝗛,          a coffee addicted book worm meets a tired college student in the park. together they bond over coffee talks. they aren't exactly friends or strangers for that matter, however one thing remains certain: they would die together. maybe dying won't be lonely when you have someone by your side.   " 𝐢 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐮𝐭...          𝐥𝐞𝐭'𝐬 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐥 "         " 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐥? "       " 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐰𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐡 𝐝𝐢𝐞 "   ↶ ꒰ 𝙲𝙾𝙽𝚃𝙰𝙸𝙽𝚂 ˏˏ 🖇️꒱ ─ human! elmo x gn! reader ─ slight fluff/angst . comedy . random . ─ TRIGGER WARNING: double suicide 🍃...→ author note , actually it's more like an oc named elmo x reader than an elmo x reader now that i realize lmfao. ────────────── short fanfic by: @-cxothicol     ↳ ꒰🏷️꒱ STATUS: [𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗣𝗟𝗘𝗧𝗘𝗗]
❛ [ 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐈𝐅𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒 ] ❜  duolingo x reader by -cxothicol
❛ [ 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐈𝐅𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒 ] ❜  duolingo x reader
-cxothicol
  • Reads 3,654
  • Votes 117
  • Parts 5
❛ 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐈𝐅𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒 ❜                   ❪ duolingo x gn! reader ❫ whatever you do, do NOT avoid the notifications. it might seem like nothing, just a simple 'swipe away' but trust me, it is more than that. i repeat, do NOT ignore the notifications. 𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘪𝘵. unless of course... you wanna face the consequences? ❝ it seems you've been avoiding your spanish lessons since 37 days ago ❞ ❝ shit... ❞ ❝ 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘸... ❞ ──────────── written by: @-cxothicol     ↳ ꒰🏷️꒱ STATUS: [ incomplete ? but has a somewhat closing ending ]