I don't mean to hurt you but I can't love you infront of everyone

What do I do when I fall in love with the girl I'm supposed to hate? Exactly, so I love her in private and hate her in public I know it's terrible And I can tell I hurt her but my image I can't. But dear ziggy berman I love you I really do. ~love, Sheila. ( I DONT OWN THESE CHARACTERS FEAR STREET)