dear seungkwan...

soonyoung meets a dreamless boy

Soonyoung is a wall away from Jihoon, always armed with free chocolate chip cookies and cute latte art; Jihoon, on the other hand, just wants his peace of mind.

to most people, the sun is up there, in the galaxy; big and bright, yellow and burning, more than a thousand degrees hot. but to jihoon, the sun is down here, smiling and laughing as if he doesn't know that his smile is the closest thing jihoon could get to experiencing what heaven is like. published; 02/14/18, 10:10pm #21 | 05/11/18

Not much has changed. Jihoon still likes those long talks, the sight of Soonyoung climbing through his window at night. He still lets Soonyoung read him his horoscope every morning. That list of documentaries is dwindling, but that's okay. Jihoon still loves Soonyoung - his kind, starry-eyed Soonyoung - and Soonyoung loves him. Oh, but the stars are dimming; oh, the moon loses a bit of its glow with each passing night. The year is ending and who knows what else - and Jihoon's never been so scared of the dark, but he knows what he's willing to do to make it through the night. He knows who he'd cross the universe for. He just hopes he isn't alone in that sentiment. [part 2 to moonwatcher - you may want to read that before starting on this, if you haven't already!]

to most people, the sun is up there, in the galaxy; big and bright, yellow and burning, more than a thousand degrees hot. to soonyoung, the sun is down here, too close but still too far to reach. he loved too deeply, and that was his catastrophe. but isn't better to have been burned by the sun than to have never flown at all? #6 08/25/18 published: 07/15/18

So, they broke up. A while ago. Jihoon thinks he remembers it hurting for a while, a dull ache pulsing purple on the softest parts of his heart, but in time, he healed. They both took the heartbreak of their experience, packed it into a box and left it locked up in their respective closets, never to be looked upon. Old wounds that neither of them could afford opening up again. Or, that's what Jihoon had thought. Soonyoung never was one to get rid of old habits so easily.

Jihoon's got a starlit heart and a laugh that sounds like Saturn, and Soonyoung is painfully besotted. Or, the one where Soonyoung is a space / astrology enthusiast who's head over heels for his best friend.

If you were to ask Soonyoung, he'd tell you that love - romantic, mind you - is a sham. It never works, it's a waste of time, there's no point in trying. If you were to ask Soonyoung, he'd tell you he's perfectly happy without the added stress. Oh, but Jihoon? He's really pretty, Soonyoung would be lying if he said he wasn't, and he's so kind. Interesting and talented, too, maybe, with a little extra something that's enough to make Soonyoung's heart beat fast. He can't say he's ever met someone like that, before. Jihoon makes lovely pictures with his lovely paints. Jihoon lets Soonyoung watch him, sometimes. Jihoon can make art out of nothing, and maybe that applies to more than just a blank canvas.

Jihoon, drawn in tired lines, finds him every night; bright and gentle with a moonlit smile.