You can actually cook, good for you. Now you can cook in front of Gordon Ramsay. And now you're 27 with no say in this. --- You glanced over at the other contestants. They're all professionals. A sweat formed onto your face. As the food you have to cook was slowly revealed, you wondered about the challenge.

Tom is a fucking idiot. Tord is too. What happens when they both want to die? I hate Dear Starboy and the TomTord ship, so here's my (improved) take on the tragic tale. Wonderful cover art by me (This is a parody of the popular Dear Starboy. Plot belongs to the original author. This is all meant to be taken as a joke, so don't get your panties in a twist.)