crackfic-esque. writing this bc im hyperfixated on these stupid movies and i have no other outlet for said hyperfixation. pls help me. this takes place in between the first and second movies. the reader's appearance isn't ever described so this is poc friendly, all-body types friendly, all that good stuff. gender neutral aside from one joke that could suggest reader is afab but it's never brought up again. warning for language and innuendos/dirty jokes ig. idk if u already watched the ace ventura movies you'll be fine. afab reader but gender neutral mostly. fanfiction is written in all-lowercase (sorry im working on rewriting with proper capitalization) but there shouldnt be any grammar/spelling mistakes otherwise. (the best written crackfic this town has ever seen) 30k words total