!! COMPLETED !! BOOK 2 IS UP!! twitter: catietempleman instagram: catetempleman tumblr: we-ah-foive-secuhnds-of-summah

A bunch of hilarious,pee your pants funny jokes in one place. Have a nice reading and Remember you can't spell swag without sw and ag!

Cherry blossom lipstick: check Smokey eyes: check Skinny jeans: check Dead kid in the mirror: check For sixteen year old Mattie Hathaway, this is her normal everyday routine. She's been able to see ghosts since her mother tried to murder her when she was five years old. No way does she want anyone to know she can talk to spooks. Being a foster kid is hard enough without being labeled a freak too. Normally, she just ignores the ghosts and they go away. There's a little glitch this time. The ghost she sees is her foster sister, Sally. Everyone thinks she's just another runaway. Mattie knows the truth, though-she's dead, murdered. Foster kids look out for each other and Mattie feels like she has to help Sally, but she can't do it alone. Against her better judgment, she teams up with a young police officer and together they set out to discover the truth of Sally's disappearance. Now the killer has set his sights on her. It becomes a race to see if she can find the truth before the serial killer finds her.

Hey! Have you ever wanted to be the most annoying person on earth? Well sorry but that position is currently occupied by me. That's ok though, because here is your guide to be the equal most annoying person ever! It's got all you need to know to be totally annoying to everyone. Obviously as a joke of course. Trust me, press "Start Reading" and within a few days you'll come to love it. - AA

Okie's fifteen. She lives in New York. She's got a few problems: she's failing geography, her dad's a wimp, and her mother, Sumatra, is a stone cold bitch. But things get a lot worse when Sumatra turns into a zombie and eats Okie's dad. Clio, Okie's grandmother, lives in Toronto; but since the zombie apocalypse, Toronto's a lot further away than it used to be. Clio suggests that Okie transport Sumatra across the border, because family is family. But coaching Okie by cellphone isn't easy, and Clio has some zombies of her own to contend with. Luckily she has some garden tools. Naomi Alderman and Margaret Atwood team up for this unusual two-hander. Encompassing love, death, sex, and the meaning of family, The Happy Zombie Sunrise Home will surprise, delight, and convince you of the vital importance of keeping ready supplies of rhubarb and mini-wieners in your freezer at all times. The story unfolds beginning October 24.

(and yet, I still love it). ©genie_us :: Unedited, unfiltered, and damn filthy.

!!COMPLETED!! BOOK 3 IS UP!!! twitter: catietempleman instagram: catetempleman kik: _catiieee_x © COPYRIGHT @niallerzprincezzz ALL RIGHTS RESERVED