Log Horizon Fanfic (my first story ever)

As this is my first story, please message me on what you think. I am open to suggestions and tips on writing my next story.

Log Horizon - Shiroe's sister

Both Shiroe and Rinne are excited with Elder Tales' release of 12th expansion pack. However, during the release, more than 30 thousands of players 'entered into' Elder Tales, including both of them. 'Well, might as well enjoy while it last~~' Rin thought. In this story, i only own my character (IRL name is Rin and G...