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  • Of Woes, Bows and Hoes (Vernon Dursley X Dolores Umbridge)
    1.9K 72 8

    On a dreary, miserable eve Vernon Dursley finds himself swept away and enraptured by the most unlikely of woes. (and hoes). Join him on his life changing journey as he finds himself, a wife, a pig-child and possibly more than he bargained for in this harrowing tale. Updated summary. I hadn't realised how much of a mes...

  • Dumbledore X Sherbet Lemons
    9.9K 437 13

    𝑳𝒂𝒕𝒆 𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒏𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕, 𝑨𝒍𝒃𝒖𝒔 𝑫𝒖𝒎𝒃𝒍𝒆𝒅𝒐𝒓𝒆 𝒇𝒊𝒏𝒅𝒔 𝒉𝒊𝒎𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒇 𝒔𝒕𝒓𝒐𝒍𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒍𝒆𝒊𝒔𝒖𝒓𝒆𝒍𝒚 𝒕𝒐𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒅𝒔 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒔𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒃𝒆𝒕 𝒍𝒆𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒔. "𝑰𝒕'𝒔 𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒆," 𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒂𝒊𝒅 𝒍𝒐𝒏𝒈𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒍𝒚. "𝑾𝒆 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘" 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒚 𝒓𝒆𝒑𝒍𝒊𝒆𝒅 𝒊𝒏 𝒖𝒏𝒊𝒔𝒐𝒏. "𝒀𝒐𝒖-𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒄𝒂𝒏 𝒕𝒂𝒍𝒌...

    Completed  
  • Harry X The Floor [Floorwarts]
    3.7K 223 7

    𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒘𝒂𝒔𝒏'𝒕 𝒂𝒍𝒘𝒂𝒚𝒔 𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒚. 𝑰𝒏 𝒇𝒂𝒄𝒕, 𝒎𝒐𝒔𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒊𝒎𝒆 𝒊𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒔𝒏'𝒕. 𝑰𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒂𝒘𝒌𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒅, 𝒊𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒋𝒊𝒕𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒚, 𝒊𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒔𝒂𝒄𝒓𝒊𝒇𝒊𝒄𝒆. 𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝒚𝒆𝒕, 𝒕𝒐 𝒍𝒊𝒗𝒆 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒊𝒕 𝒊𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒈𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒔𝒕 𝒐𝒇𝒇𝒆𝒏𝒄𝒆 𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅 𝒊𝒏𝒇𝒍𝒊�...

    Completed  
  • A Match Made in Azkaban
    6.1K 363 7

    A dementor named Billy Joe is (for some odd reason) on his way to win Dolores Umbridge's foul and nonexistent heart. Stay tuned for their first kiss. MWAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAA!! (I already added a Demumbridge kiss scene at the end, so don't murder me. It's not a very nice experience.) Completed...

    Completed