TW: mentions abuse, depression and other things that could be triggering to some people. Slurs are used in regards to gay people, so keep that in mind. Lams fanfic: John is a Starbucks barista who meets Alex and falls in love with him, but struggles to accept himself. Between years of bullying and abuse, John is sceptical and believes no one will ever love him This is my first big writing piece, so please be nice! *this may not fit in with canon or other fanfics. These characters are what I need right now, so for reference in both fics, John is my mental state, Laff is who I wish I were, and Herc is me as a personality.

I'm not giving away too much, but this story may or may not contain things from the following list. Abuse, (sexual, verbal, child, physical, etc.) Swearing or slurs in regards to gay couples Depression, anxiety, and other mental illnesses Fluff (no smut) For fanfic purposes, Hercules is G A Y and uses words to express emotion and is dating Lafayette who is pansexual and must have physical contact as often as possible. Lafayette must go to France for a month, leaving Hercules on his own. Laff meets up with his old friends, who aren't quite as he remembers them. Herc is faced with tough choices and some of his greatest fears, only now he is left to face them alone. I hope you enjoy this, it's a slightly different style than my John x Alex fanfic.

"The first rule of living on the streets (or rather, living at all) is that you never get too attached to anything. Don't waste your time. Don't make the effort. Because fortunes changed by the second. People don't stay. Alex was smart enough to know how it worked. He was also smart enough to know that he'd crossed that line with John too long ago to take it back." ------------------------ There's usually one rule when it comes to having a big group of friends: Do NOT date inside of the group. It's strict but simple, it avoids third wheeling scenarios and messy breakups; those never end well. So, truly, falling in love with your childhood best friend fucking sucked. Highest rankings: #1 in Laurens #1 in Lams #1 in LamsAu #1 in Musicaltheatre (I love you guys. thank you for the support.) *trigger warnings are written at the start of chapters in this book in as much detail as i can,, i try to cover any potentially triggering content throughout in that list. if i ever miss anything, please let me know! i'm still learning!* please know that this book is written in the perspective of several unreliable narrators. i do not endorse some of the behaviour and mindsets presented throughout this book!!! they are not my own and you should not replicate any of it!