Ever wondered how the bible would've been affected by our large mass of thots if it were to be written in modern-day thotland? Yeah, neither have I. So enjoy every page from the existing Bible translated into millennial language: THOT. (This is not to intentionally harm or attack religious people or religion in general- this entire piece is for humour purposes only.)

A young librarian is hired by an eccentric noble to document and keep order of his fast library. When she arrives at the noble's old Elizabethan-style mansion, she is reminded of Jane Eyre. Unfortunately for her, the adventure she finds herself in is not a drama. Enjoy as she battles Lovecraftian monsters, demon cults, and the mansion's tendency to appreciate getting everyone and everything lost in its hallways.

What would have happened if Harry had gotten the diary Horcrux instead of Ginny? Harry is confused about many things. Why won't Dumbledore let him stay at Hogwarts for the summer instead of go back to the Dursleys? Why won't Ginny leave him alone, even after he tells her he's gay? Why do Ron and Hermione keep meeting with Dumbledore and not telling him about it? With the help of his new friend, Tom Riddle, Harry answers these questions and more.... (Tomarry) Do not read while eating or drinking or in the middle of the night. This book is very humorous. Apparently.