Sick of cliché Wattpad books? Then this isn't the book for you. We take every single over-used plot, character and trope on Wattpad - from player-meets-nerd to my-boyfriend-is-a-vampire - and mash it all into one, awful, hilarious parody. NOTE: This is a parody. Characters have not been created to mock a race/nationality/sexuality, they have been created to lightly poke fun at the way certain teen fiction writers reduce them into crude stereotypes. Thanks for helping this pile of junk get to #1 in Humor!

He just wants her booty, but she'll end up stealing his heart. ***** After pirates kidnap seventeen-year-old Ana in a case of mistaken identity, the orphaned housemaid prepares for the worst. Instead, between a shipwreck, mutiny, and her growing feelings for her captor -- the dashing Pirate King of the Caribbean, Alestair Kincade -- Ana soon realizes the secret she keeps is far from the most dangerous part of her new life. But playing the wholesome daughter of a Spanish admiral among rag-tag buccaneers isn't easy either, and to avoid both discovery and the gallows she'll have to learn to rely on more than just her wits and her charm. But is Alestair Kincade really on her side? Or will his protection and his love both disappear the moment he learns the truth? Book Two of The Pirate King Series is called SCUTTLE (formerly The Reluctant Pirate Queen) [Now an audiobook from Hachette, Powered by Wattpad] [word count: 90,000-100,000 words] PLUNDER (Book One in The Pirate King Series) © 2014 by R.S. Kovach. All rights reserved. No part of this work may be reproduced without the author's written permission. Cover designed by Ren T

"Watch where you’re going nerd!" Someone said knocking me down, while sending my books flying. I let out a sigh as I crouched down, collecting my books from the floor. Once I got up I saw the person who called me nerd a few seconds ago was standing in front of me wearing a smug expression. "What's wrong nerd? Cat got your tongue?" I looked around the hallway, noticing that we’ve drawn a crowd. "What are you mute?" I rolled my eyes as I began to walk away, only to be pulled back and slammed against the lockers. I heard a few gasps coming from our audience. He seemed like a jerk, and judging by what he had just done, I was right. However, he was extremely good looking I had to give him that, with dark brown hair seemed sticking out in all directions and dark brown eyes. "Listen nerd, I don't know who you think you are but no one walks away from me when I talk to them. Got it?" He hissed at me. I let out a chuckle. This guy was unbelievable. "You don't own me, so I suggest you let go of me before I do something that you will regret." I said in a bored tone. His brown eyes narrowed at me, as he let out what seems to be a forced out laugh. "Oh, so the nerd does talk." I heard a few people snickering as he let go of my arm. "I am going to let you go, nerd. But, trust me this isn't over." He whispered into my ear. * Alice "Ali" Montclair has a secret she's the daughter of the man who runs the country- The President. When her father dropped the news that he was going to run for president seven years ago. Alice was happy for her dad up until her whole life gets turned upside down. Fast forward seven years, Alice finally gets the chance to go to back to school and it wasn't any regular school it was high school. When she angers the schools bad boy, her life gets even more complicated. She starts to struggle with school, friends and above all being The President's Daughter. Cover Credits: @heysaleena Trailer Credits: @itsjustmejessica14

"Just one little bite and I can drain all your blood," he states while planting kisses along my neck. "Better yet I'll drain your blood, kill you, then change you into a monster like me." "You won't do it," I whisper as my voice wavers with uncertainty. He chuckles against my neck. "Are you sure about that Isabel?" And then he bites me.

"Just," he pressed his lips to mine, "this one time." I breathed out, leaning in to him at the feeling of his touch. "You've said that the past three times," he chuckled, pressing my back into a wall. He lifted my legs and wrapped them around him, muttering "Let's face it, you're my little sex nerd." "Just because you can't get laid by anyone else?" I smirked. This made him shrug and instead of responding, he kissed me. -•-•-•- "What do I get out of it?" I asked, pressing my books closer to my chest. He laughed, leaning against a door. "Reed," he started, "Sweet, sweet, nerdy little Reed. You get to indulge in the mental and physical images of this," he gestured down his body, "gorgeous being." I sighed, mentally making a list of both pros and cons. I guess it wouldn't hurt; it's not like we're going to get married from this, right? "Fine, whatever, Elliot." He grinned at me, before slowly backing up. "Thanks, nerd! Be . . ." He looked around to see if anyone was in hearing distance. When he realized that everyone but us had left Uni, he spoke once again: "Meet me at mine tonight at six o'clock." -•-•- I hadn't seen anything bad coming from it, I honestly hadn't. Little did I know that I would end up in such a mess. And it's all because of Elliot Winters wanting me to be his little nerd with benefits.