"Well, Miss Alice, Haven't you ever heard of Jack the Ripper?"

"Kids, I'm going to tell you a story. The story of How I Met Your Mother." Rankings: Humour: #915 [29.4.2014] - #488 [30.4.2014] - #402 [1.5.2014] - #288 [11.5.2014] - #283 [13.6.2014] FanFiction: #726 [30.4.2014] - #583 [1.5.2014] - #355 [11.5.2014] - #330 [13.6.2014] Cover by: @-mmxii

He just stood there staring at me. "Can I help you?" I asked gaining some confidence. "Yeah. You can start by sorting out these files, contacting these people, and getting me a coffee." He said dropping several folders on my desk. He started to walk out the door when I spoke again. "Who do you think you are?" I asked annoyed "I think that I'm Ashton Irwin, your new boss." ___________ Story Began- August 30, 2014 Highest Ranking- Fanfiction: 74

"Calum, why is everyone in this town so afraid of you?" [this isn't scary i promise]