struggle with the destructive need for control, navigating the complex relationship with my body, self-worth, and the toll of their eating habits. What begins as a quest for perfection turns into an awakening to the harsh realities of self-doubt, isolation, and physical and emotional exhaustion. Through vulnerability and self-compassion, I learn to challenge harmful thoughts and redefine success

High school became a sanctuary for me, offering a sense of belonging I couldn't find at home. It was a place where I could explore and express my true self, even if cautiously. A pivotal moment came when my friends introduced me to makeup, and for the first time, I felt liberated. But after an assault by a classmate, the school's response only worsened the situation, involving my parents and revealing my identity. Their rejection and disapproval forced me to leave home, but in doing so, I discovered resilience and strength.

In which I fall in love with my brother's best friend. ***** "Don't pretend like you don't feel anything." His voice is low, sending shivers down my spine. "What do you mean?" "You know damn well what I mean." "I don't know what you're talking about." I pretend to ignore him, flipping some pages in my book. "Come on. I have all these assignments waiting. Aren't you supposed to teach me tonight?" "It depends on what you want me to teach." He smirks, his voice sounding even more dangerous. ***** I thought that my brother was the most popular guy in school, but as soon as I step into my university life, I realize how wrong I was. Meet Vaughn Cooper, his best friend. The guy is the epitome of every girl's dream. Godlike handsome. The quarterback. He's got the looks, and he's got the brain. Come on, he's got the scholarship to one of the most prestigious universities in the country, while I have just barely passed the entrance examination after long years of struggle during high school. How could a guy who worked that hard and deserves nothing more but adoration be labeled as a bad boy? Yeah, the answer is simple. The moment we lock eyes, I realize something as I stare into those piercing, amber eyes. He's not every girl's dream. He's every girl's nightmare. In my case, MY nightmare. Calm down, heart. Our story hasn't even started. ***** THE SPENCERS SERIES BOOK #1 © 2020 Anya Jayvyn. All Rights Reserved. (Content warning: This book has descriptive sexual content, explicit language, and triggering themes)