Being insecure can be a crippling experience, especially when it drives away the person you love. The agony of not giving my girlfriend enough attention while dealing with my own demons is unbearable. I can feel the distance growing between me and my once-close partner, and it hurts more than words can describe. My insecurity stems from a deep-seated belief that I am not good enough, that I am a disappointment to those around me. I have always felt like the black sheep of the family, the never-seen son. I've always wondered why I never measure up, but now I know the reason, and it's a betrayal that cuts to my core. The pain of realizing that I am a secret shame my family kept from me, is excruciating. I can't accept it, and I feel like a bastard, unworthy of anyone's love, especially Coachella's. She's everything I am not, and I can't bear the thought of tarnishing her perfect life with my tainted presence. I fear that if I stick with her, I'll only end up making her feel the way I made my mother feel, like a failure. So, I pushed her away, unable to see that I'm only hurting her more. "You are such a bastard asshole, Izo!" I am though... Funny how I just learned that I am a bastard. And hearing it from her mouth... is the downfall of me. Started: Finished: Published: Status: COMING SOON Follow me on my socials for more updates. IG: smnthawsm Twitter: awsmbi FB: Samantha Claire Lim Radaza | awsmbi E-mail: claire.radaza02@gmail.com

Pushing someone I love away to keep her safe is a harrowing experience. It feels like my heart is being ripped out of my chest as I try to resist the urge to hold her close. Every moment with her is excruciating because I know that I am going to have to hurt her. I screamed for help, hoping that someone will hear me and take the burden off my shoulders, but no one seems to care. The girl I love heard my cries once, but I cannot let her in on the danger. I have to be strong, even if it means breaking my own heart. I would break just to protect her. I clenched my fist so tightly that my thumb tucked inside my palm, a silent cry for help that nobody sees. "Miso, I'm here!" I closed my eyes as I remember her eagerness to help. I wish you were still here, Czarina. But I need to do this. I'll break ten folds just to protect you. Started: Finished: Published: Status: COMING SOON Follow me on my socials for more updates. IG: smnthawsm Twitter: awsmbi FB: Samantha Claire Lim Radaza | awsmbi E-mail: claire.radaza02@gmail.com

Leaving someone I love for the sake of my own salvation is a pain that consumes me from the inside out. It's a feeling of helplessness and despair that suffocates me, leaving me gasping for air in a sea of regret and guilt. I thought I was doing the right thing, that by saving myself, I would be able to save her too. But I was wrong. She drowned. And now, all I feel is guilt. Guilt for not being able to save her, guilt for surviving when she didn't, guilt for not realizing how much she needed me until it was too late. All I want is to have her back, to tell her how sorry I am, and to make everything right again. But I know it's too late. The pain of losing her is a wound that will never fully heal, a constant reminder of what could have been, and what was lost. "I want you broken like how broken I am, Kahel. I loathe you." There was so much rage in her voice that I just want to breakdown right then and there. "Then I beg you to break me, Vica..." Started: Finished: Published: Status: COMING SOON Follow me on my socials for more updates. IG: smnthawsm Twitter: awsmbi FB: Samantha Claire Lim Radaza | awsmbi E-mail: claire.radaza02@gmail.com

Some lies don't drown. They wait to bloom. Even the mud remembers what it grew into. Pinili ni Pierce ang maghintay nang biglang naglaho si Sasha. She was pregnant and depressed, hiding a truth she flew away to bury. Pagkalipas ng maraming taon, magkatrabaho na sila bilang doktor at nurse. Close proximity with him is torture, it's impossible not to go back into the FUBU setup she'd run away from. She has secrets now... Pero paano niya sasabihin ang katotohanan sa lalaking ayaw naman talagang maging ama? Started: Finished: Published: Status: COMING SOON Follow me on my socials for more updates. IG: smnthawsm Twitter: awsmbi FB: Samantha Claire Lim Radaza | awsmbi E-mail: claire.radaza02@gmail.com

The truth will either save her... or bury her. Because if memories betray you, who do you trust? The man who saved her life? Who also might be the one to destroy it? Pagod na si Drex sa malamig at madilim na buhay, kaya handa na sana siyang tapusin ito. Ngunit, hindi ito natuloy dahil kinailangan niyang sagipin ang isang babae. Laya woke up with no recollection of what happened. May amnesia siya. She later found herself under Drex's roof. He saved her. But, what if he realizes that the woman he sheltered is a murderer? Mas lalo lamang naging kumplikado ang lahat... lalo na't ramdam niya ang mainit na tensyon at atraksyon sa pagitan nilang dalawa. Started: December 20, 2024 Finished: November 19, 2025 Published: Status: COMPLETED Follow me on my socials for more updates. IG: smnthawsm Twitter: awsmbi FB: Samantha Claire Lim Radaza | awsmbi E-mail: claire.radaza02@gmail.com

To love again, he must betray the memory of the one he lost. Para sagipin ang kanilang ospital, kailangan ni Astrid pakasalan ang anak ng may-ari ng lupa, only to learn that she's marrying her patient, Ivan. Ang lalaking alam niya'y mahal na mahal pa rin ang yumaong girlfriend nito. Paanong hindi? She's his new therapist. Started: December 20, 2023 Finished: January 3, 2024 Published: UNDER HBP Status: COMPLETED Follow me on my socials for more updates. IG: smnthawsm Twitter: awsmbi FB: Samantha Claire Lim Radaza | awsmbi Email: claire.radaza02@gmail.com Book cover by Nefeliday.