"As I sat on the toilet, I realized how badass I was being. First of all, I (kind of) broke into Walmart; Second, I was (kind of) plotting to steal toilet paper; and third, I was doing all this while a hurricane was brewing outside." Ellie wanted a quick trip to Walmart to buy some toilet paper for her mom. A minute in, a minute out. Instead, she got locked in. With her secret love, of course.

You want it all? And you want it now? Players? Vampires? Werewolves? Nerds and Jocks? Rockstars? Princesses? Kidnappers? Falling in love with your best friend? This short story has everything you're wishing for! Come in! Let's play: Spot the cliché! (Attention: Parody ahead. Read at your own risk.)