CK_writes
To those who have been waiting for so long
I am one of you. I waited in silence that felt louder than screams, waited in hope that slowly rotted inside my chest, waited even when every part of me was already breaking and begging me to stop.
I waited a million times to be chosen by the person I chose every single day. I stayed through the hurt, made excuses for the unfairness, kept loving even when the love given back to me felt light, careless, and unsure. I told myself patience was love. I told myself if I endured long enough, I would finally be worth staying for.
But the cruelest part wasn't that you never loved me back. It was what I became while waiting for you. I learned how to swallow my needs, how to silence my own heart, how to accept crumbs and call them enough just so you wouldn't leave.
I watched you live freely, untouched by the damage you caused, while I stood still, counting messages, rereading memories, measuring my worth by how often you chose to look my way. And when it finally shattered, I understood: what destroyed me wasn't the waiting. It was realizing I spent so much of my life waiting for someone who never had any intention of staying.