They're worlds apart, and this isn't high school, so how the hell did a homeless female writer end up renting a billionaire's mansion? And - hold your breath - becoming his fake girlfriend? ➳ full blurb inside ➳ first reached #1 in humor on july 6, 2015 ➳ first reached #1 in business on august 29, 2023 ➳ winner of best humor book in the fiction awards 2016 ➳ featured by cadbury (marvellous creations) and secret lives of the americans (pivot) P.S. This is a SATIRICAL BILDUNGSROMAN. Proceed with caution. (cover by @glueeater)

the memories we leave behind. the spicks and the specks of life.

Cigarettes, lilac skies and poetry at 3am: sixteen-year-old Pietro ''Pit'' Rossi knows the adrenaline of feeling empty and infinite at the same time. With the reputation of a goofy idiot who doesn't care about anything at all, getting held back at school doesn't seem like a problem. But it is. Because Pit cares about everything, and he always cares too much. [[word count: 70,000-80,000 words]]

COMPLETED "I think you're hiding something," he said accusingly, his voice low and dangerous. "I think you're crazy," I retorted. My heart was beating rapidly. ~ When you lead a life kept to the shadows- metaphorically and physically- it can be hard to make friends. I'm not going to say I was a loser, a complete outcast at my school. In fact, there was no one that I shared a hatred with. My life, which was more or less secretive, was completely shaken when Emmett Dean rocked himself into my world. Completely uninvited, might I add. And all he did was spill his spaghetti on me. ~ Coves are encouraged! Highest Ranking: #14 - 9/27/17 *UNEDITED featured by Teen Fiction

When the quiet girl in Clayton Hugh's chemistry class comes knocking on his door at five in the morning barely covered up in her little pajamas, inattentive, and drooling like crazy, he has no choice but to take her inside. But once Lucy Walker wakes up inside a room she has never seen before wearing an over-sized t-shirt and gym shorts, you can imagine the pure panic setting in her. The subtle addition of Clayton entering the room shirtless doesn't help much either. After three years of fawning over him, leave it up to her sleepwalking to finally get Clayton Hugh to notice her.

she liked to write stories. it was easier to be lost in fake worlds than the real one. however, there might be more to reality than originally thought.

When Franny learns why former popular boy Tyler fell from grace, she gets thrown head-first into his dangerous world but also closer to his timid heart. ***** Eighteen-year-old Tyler Madden used to have everything. He was captain of the football team, popular, high achiever, and was set to have a successful career. But when a secret too hard to handle comes to light, he turns to underground fighting to deal with the pain. Now, he's in too deep. And when Francesca Howard befriends him at school in the hopes of figuring out what went wrong, she unknowingly gets pulled into the criminal world he's now stuck in. As the two find comfort in each other, they find themselves faced with their impending future and trying to get Tyler out alive. Content/Trigger Warning: this story contains scenes pertaining to drug use, substance abuse, and violence. [#1 in teen fiction, romance and action]

Hadley Jamison doesn't know what to think when she hears that her classmate, Archer Morales, committed suicide. She didn't exactly know him, but that doesn't stop her from feeling like there was something she could have done to help him. So to Hadley's surprise, on the very night of Archer's funeral, she has a run in with Death himself and is offered the chance to go back in time to stop Archer from ending his life. The catch? She only has twenty-seven days to do it. And if Hadley doesn't succeed? Well, she doesn't want to think about that.