(Warning, self-harm and violence.) Dan Howell and Phil Lester have been through a lot of bad things in their sixteen years of living, things that will scar them forever, mentally and physically. When they find each other they feel happy together, but things get worse. The thing that they want to know is.. was their relationship a blessing or a curse?

Phil starts getting cute, little messages from a secret admirer and gradually feels himself falling more and more in love with the boy. But can you really like someone you've never seen before? And what will happen when Phil finds out the real identity of his admirer?

Phil doesn't have a best friend in his life. That is, until Dan turns up at his school. They become close and Phil finds out that Dan has a twin brother, but hates to talk about him. It's not until Phil comes over to Dan's house that he finds out why.

Phil doesn't talks. Well, not anymore. The last time he said something, was when he didn't hate himself. And that was a long time ago. But now, everything is different. He must struggle with depression, whilst new boy Dan Howell desperately attempts to win him over. [Warning: this could be triggering at some points]

Part 1 of the infamous series. Feelings appear. Sparks fly. Love rises. Problems occur. Please note: This story is now very old (7 years old in 2020) and I'd like to think my writing has improved since then! There are a bunch of cringey parts and bad writing in here, but enjoy and thanks for reading! :)

❝A book for comebacks.❞ WARNING// If easily offended please do not read this book as you might be upset by some of the content.