They're worlds apart, and this isn't high school, so how the hell did a homeless female writer end up renting a billionaire's mansion? And - hold your breath - becoming his fake girlfriend? ➳ full blurb inside ➳ first reached #1 in humor on july 6, 2015 ➳ first reached #1 in business on august 29, 2023 ➳ winner of best humor book in the fiction awards 2016 ➳ featured by cadbury (marvellous creations) and secret lives of the americans (pivot) P.S. This is a SATIRICAL BILDUNGSROMAN. Proceed with caution. (cover by @glueeater)

*****WATTYS 2015 WINNER!***** WATTPAD STAFF PICK (9/7/15) In the end, the robots win. But you already knew that. "Everyone Died + My iPhone Stopped Working" is a collection of short interviews with some of the survivors. People who have tremendous insight into the rise of Artificially Intelligent machines or, more often, don't. Why did the robots rise up? What did they want? Why couldn't they be stopped? Can they be stopped now? Is humanity doomed? And what the f--k is going on with the squirrels? You will get the answers to all of these questions. Or some of these questions. Or none of these questions. We'll see. I will be updating this once a week until I run out of stuff that I find funny. Then I'm done. Cover art courtesy of the hilarious and ridiculously talented Dave Pressler. (http://www.davepresslerart.com)

" we're friends right? well, you can't really tell me otherwise anyway, which is probably why we're friends. " Or the story of an overenthusiastic boy called Phil, who has trouble shutting up, and a reluctantly mute boy called Dan, who's life is falling apart, and how they both come to realise that sometimes - actions can speak louder than words.

the road trip of a lifetime. [ cover by blissom / trailer by blissom ] [ started march 30th, 2013 - ended february 18, 2015 © paulina r. all rights reserved ]

in a world where your moods are visible above your head, displayed through pictures and icons, it's impossible to hide your true feelings. however dan howell seems to be lacking this. labelled as an emotionless freak, dan is outcasted because his moods are never visible. that is, until an endlessly happy boy named phil wonders why.

In which Kiara Bergmann meets a German boy who should've been buried over two hundred years ago. [Extended summary inside] #22 Short Story #115 Humor

Was published, but is now off the market--I'm sorry! Brianne is the opposite of her best friend, Kyla. Kyla is open-minded; Brianne is closed off, judgmental. Kyla is a hopeless romantic. Brianne? Not so much. So when Kyla shoves an apple into her face telling her to throw it across the cafeteria so she can find her future love, Brianne is anything but interested. And yet she throws the apple anyway. Who does the apple hit? Dannon Barone, the most popular boy in school. Though he's seemingly sweet and all-smiles, Brianne dislikes him. She thinks he's a fake, a fraud, someone who is just charming the crowds in order to gain popularity. But Brianne is about to learn that stereotypes are not true, and that she's been too quick to judge those around her. Brianne Nichols' life is about to change forever. And what does she have to thank for it? A bruised piece of fruit. Who would have known that a stupid apple could be right? | technically not part of the summary | Okay, so I know the prenote says to find any errors you can. Just letting you know there's no point to that anymore because I've reedited it two more times after this one (extensively so), and already sent it in to be self-published. The only reason that the prenote is still up is because a fan made an amusing slideshow and if I edit anything then the tags for the wattys will be gone and I'll no longer be entered , hahah!

For Carter Vance, popularity is a world that she has purposely distanced herself from for many years. Why feed in to the totally superficial, social hierarchy of high school? She's perfectly happy being an outsider. But when she's challenged to prove that anyone can be popular, she puts everything on the line to make a point - that popularity is as fickle and cliché as all the teen movies make it out to be. What she does instead is ruin her true friendships, hurt the only guy who has ever mattered, and dig herself a hole that's much more complicated than the plot of all of her favourite movies combined. {Book 1 in the Teenage Guide series}

Sometimes the answer can be as simple as a kiss. [extended summary inside]

Phil Lester is sweet and cute; known for his kindness and enthusiasm. Dan Howell is a tough, cold outsider; known as the school's stereotypical 'bad boy'. But if he's so bad, then why on earth did he rescue Phil Lester and give him a smile which would melt anyone's heart?