They're worlds apart, and this isn't high school, so how the hell did a homeless female writer end up renting a billionaire's mansion? And - hold your breath - becoming his fake girlfriend? ➳ full blurb inside ➳ first reached #1 in humor on july 6, 2015 ➳ first reached #1 in business on august 29, 2023 ➳ winner of best humor book in the fiction awards 2016 ➳ featured by cadbury (marvellous creations) and secret lives of the americans (pivot) P.S. This is a SATIRICAL BILDUNGSROMAN. Proceed with caution. (cover by @glueeater)

Louis Tomlinson wanted attention, but not this much. ____________________________________ cover idea credit to: @-voidallison. book idea credit to: panic by sharon draper.

The only way to date him is to beat his best score in Flappy Bird. University!AU, Larry One-Shot based on the famous, addictive, super-difficult and mind-bending game Flappy Bird

"Please just let me stay here. I have nowhere to go." I beg him standing at his doorstep. "Why would I?" He snaps. I feel so small,so lonely and cold under his intense gaze. "I'll do anything. Please,Harry." I sob. "Just leave." He responds closing his door. I put my hand on the doorknob just in time,making him stop. "Please." I plea looking up at him. He looks at me like I am an abandoned dog he met on the street. "Just for tonight,please. What do you want in return?" He stares at me for a second thinking about my words. After checking his surroundings he leans closer to me. "Your body." He whispers making me froze. My eyes widen at his disrespectful wish. This is so rude and arrogant but I should have known better than coming to him. I knew this would happen. 'C'mon, Amanda it's just one night,you said you would do anything. You have no other option.' I recover,gaining my confidence back. "Okay." [WARNING: sexual content, violence, strong and explicit language.]

❝Hello there, this is Teen Confessions Helpline, what's the problem? Feel free to confess anything you like and we'll be there to help you every step of the way!❞ ❝I know this is heavy but I've been feeling like I kind of...want to kill myself.❞ When Damien Carson, a depressed lonely teenager, calls a teen helpline to find one reason not to kill himself, he meets optimistic and bubbly Harry Potter fangirl Eva Adams. And in a series of phone calls, fangirl freakouts, promises, weird slash fanfictions, and bondings over Harry Potter puns, maybe he'll find a reason after all. a story about heartbreak, suicide, depression, love, friendship and two misfits that fits together like torn halves of a love letter.

"You have to learn to live, kid, not just survive."

"Never?" Another tear fell from the girl's face, but she let the salty drop cascade down her cheek. "Never."

❝hello❞ ❝its me❞ ❝i was just actually saying hello. i didnt need you to break into a song❞ ❝but that's how it works, its how you get the girl❞ in which a boy charms a girl with song lyrics through text messages. [cover by @humorously] [© 2016 aftertastefully]

Dark haired guy with light eyes are the reason she struggles to stay alive.

"Give me ten days, and I can give you ten reasons not to die." Evan paused. "And if I can't change your mind by then, you can go jump off that cliff."