They were never supposed to fall in love. In fact, they were probably never even supposed to meet. But life does that sometimes; it brings you someone who unexpectedly turns your world upside down. For Ella, it all began on the last day of summer, in a small bakery on the edge of town. With three teenage boys, a plastic knife and a rocketship birthday cake. lol I'm not dead guys

~complete~ Charlotte is as sweet as a strawberry. She's the kind of person who will drop everything just to help you, just to put a smile on your face. She's as sweet as the sugar that constantly runs through her bloodstream, and as excitable as the rush that comes with it. And then there's Benjamin, who's as sour as a lemon. The last thing on this Godforsaken planet he wants to do is acquaint himself with her. While Charlotte is kind and caring, he's rude and vulgar, while she's friendly and innocent, he's crass and mean. So how in the hell is that going to turn out?

It's always the same every year, that one dreaded day. February 14th. But, this year, it's different. This year, Arizona May has a valentine. Specifically, a valentine who also has a dangerously sexy older brother. // humor #31 / short story #63 //

My sister hates her boyfriend because he doesn't care as much. I hate mine because he cares way too much. We like them and we value our commitments. But something's not right so we make an arrangement, To switch places like we have always been. But they won't notice because... we're twins.

"They were elements that were not supposed to mix,but they were. And just like mixing hydrogen peroxide with Sulfuric Acid; Inevitable explosion." *** "This isn't right." I whispered¸ fear seeping into my voice. I felt goose bumps grow on my neck, at his sudden proximity. Control. All I needed was a little self control to stop the feeling growing in my stomach. Soon I was looking straight at him, eye to eye. He leaned in closer, I felt my knees wobble and my breath hitched, he went straight to my ear a cocky smirk making its way onto his face and whispered, "Never said it was." © 2012 All rights reserved

They're worlds apart, and this isn't high school, so how the hell did a homeless female writer end up renting a billionaire's mansion? And - hold your breath - becoming his fake girlfriend? ➳ full blurb inside ➳ first reached #1 in humor on july 6, 2015 ➳ first reached #1 in business on august 29, 2023 ➳ winner of best humor book in the fiction awards 2016 ➳ featured by cadbury (marvellous creations) and secret lives of the americans (pivot) P.S. This is a SATIRICAL BILDUNGSROMAN. Proceed with caution. (cover by @glueeater)

He lit his cigarette, I lit nothing. He drank alcohol, I drank water. He smirked, I smiled. He didn't love me, I didn't love him. He and I together wouldn't last a day. And then the game started... He said he found me intriguing, unique, and interesting because I didn't swoon over him. "You and me Grey, let's play a game. We'll date and in three months time I promise you will fall for me. When you fall in love with me between that time span, I win. If in any way you were to win I'll give up all the alcohol, cigarettes, and player ways." It was a game I wasn't willing to lose, but all games had accidents and consequences. It takes a broken heart to know how to break a heart.