PERSONAL ASSISTANT NEEDED. People skills optional. Ability to take drink orders preferred. Personal mode of transport a MUST. To Reply, Contact Dr. M's home office: 1-555-TRBLE-4-U (Idiots and those prone to knock-knock jokes need not apply.) ◎ ◎ ◎ Nobody in their right mind would respond to a help wanted listing so vague. Enter, Robin Banks. The wacky exploits of a narcoleptic super villain and his reluctant sidekick. [COMPLETED FIRST DRAFT - #22 in Humor on 4/12/15]

All Ed needed to become the Internet's latest boyfriend was a chili-pepper costume. But getting sunny foreign-exchange student Audra to prom will take a lot more than that. Ed doesn't know he's beautiful. But he is. Even when his crazy boss forces him to wear an "extra-spicy" chili pepper costume as part of a May 5th promotion. It was only meant to be an after-school job at a low-key Mexican restaurant; Ed never signed up for abject humiliation. And when a lovestruck girl snaps a covert picture of Ed while he serves her an enchilada, he couldn't possibly have anticipated becoming the internet's latest imaginary boyfriend. The fame is immediate and disorienting, but if it helps Ed convince quirky foreign exchange student Audra to attend prom with him, being "Enchilada Ed" might not be so bad. (Formerly Ignorance, Bliss, and Mexican Food)

Being a domestic goddess is a piece of cake, right? #26 CL 06.01.17 → 27.02.17

After the death of her parents, Eden does everything she can to recover from the blow. Little does she know that Cade, the boy she meets during the very first week, will be her route to redemption. She misplaces her heart and soul in an old home and he struggles with his own demons but finds room for her to heal. She's the talented dancer and he's the skilled guitarist but their passion might just be the only thing holding them together. It's the most well-known formula for disaster and they can't help but get drawn into each other.

**Officially published as Clique Bait with HarperTeen!** Payment is usually a part of a basic transaction. You give and then you take. But, at Arlington Preparatory, people take at their leisure. They take their entertainment in the form of humiliation. They get what they want at the expense of their pawns. But they never pay. Chloe Whittaker has a hit list. But not exactly the murder kind. After her best friend is ripped from Arlington, punished for her fascination with climbing the hierarchy, she knows she has to end them. One by one. Revenge is sweet, and inflicting it is even sweeter. Only, what if someone she's determined to destroy, starts to win over her heart? Highest rank: #1 in teen fiction cover by @supernovass

Six teens are devoted to a game with one rule: If a player gets tagged, they must change their life within the next fifteen minutes. The better the player, the bigger the change. One might give their car away, or punch the school bully. Another might change identities or sacrifice their virginity. Anything to keep evolving, to avoid fitting into a label or caring about the junk they own. But their quest for enlightenment has taken a rotten final turn - one of the players has murdered the game's creator, the teen prophet (cult leader?) David Bloom. Our narrator is being framed for the crime; can he clear his name and discover which of his lifelong friends is the murderer before he takes the fall? [sic] is a gritty teen murder mystery that delves into the psychology of enlightenment among the criminally dysfunctional.

[NOW PUBLISHED ON AMAZON! You can buy it here: http://bit.ly/ColdFireBUY] [*SAMPLE ONLY* LAST 10 CHAPTERS REMOVED] [A Wattpad featured novel] Melissa has a rare, undiagnosed disease, or so say the doctors that did tests on her for half of her life. She doesn't need a medical certificate to tell her that she's different. She was born with a body temperature so low that most people would die before they even started living. Keyword: most. Somehow, Melissa has managed to live for fifteen years, but those years have not been without their hardships. The doctors told her that in order for her organs to function in such cold conditions, her body must absorb the heat from the surrounding air in a painful process dubbed a "heat attack", which slowly turns her temporary home freezing and uninhabitable. Forced to move from city to city in order to keep everyone in her vicinity alive, and plagued by the stares and hushed whispers that accompany her, Melissa tries to lead a normal life. But she's failing miserably. And when she's approached by the new kid in school, all hope of an ordinary life slips from her grasp. Suddenly, strange is the new normal, and Melissa finds herself wrapped up in a new world where ghosts aren't "just in her head", glass windows shatter unprovoked, and rare, undiagnosed diseases aren't actually diseases at all. And to top it all off, someone - or multiple someones - seem to want her dead. So much for normal... © 2013 by shayebay All Rights Reserved PUBLISHED JUNE 26, 2019 WITH TYPEWRITER PUB!! You can buy it on Amazon here: http://bit.ly/ColdFireBUY A WATTPAD FEATURED NOVEL: -- from September 2015 - July 2017; -- and again in February 2018 Highest ranking: #3 in Paranormal Listen to the Cold Fire playlist here: http://8tracks.com/grymoires/cold-fire

After stumbling upon a murder, Quinn Reilly is placed under a witness-protection program. But things spiral out of control when Alpha Jed Trevino shows up, claiming to be both the murderer and her mate. All Rights Reserved. Copyright © 2015 by Noelle N.

M., a college sophomore, is haunted by the events of a year ago that ended another girl's life. In an attempt to clear her conscience, she writes her confession down in a battered notebook addressed to a stranger. This search for redemption is far more painful than she ever imagined, and she struggles to cope with her grief and guilt. As M. spirals deeper into herself, she must ask what the cost of absolution is...and if she's still willing to pay it. [ Wattpad featured story | cover by MayTijssen ]

(alternatively called: slow burn, second-hand embarrassment, and shenanigans) A girl made up of short fuses, clumsy feet and copious amounts of sarcasm has to team up with her irritatingly obnoxious neighbour in the name of love (also known as raging teenage hormones). Because in the grand scheme of things, what's a little deal with the devil? (Spoiler Alert: absolute chaos.) cover by xdemonsflowerx