In which a girl can't go a day without an anxiety attack and a boy can't go a day without noticing

A pair of sky blue eyes looked back at me. Matthew. He tapped again. I got up and pulled open my window. "What are you doing here?" I asked timidly. Even though Matthew and I were neighbors, we certainly weren't friends. "I need somewhere to stay and your house is the closest." I noticed he was sporting a fresh bruise on his cheek bone. "Don't you have a friend's house you could go to?" I asked curiously. "That's the first place he'd look." he said simply but seriously. I bit my lip unsure. "Come on, Shaina. It's one night." I finally nodded and stepped away from the window. * This story contains scenes of bullying, self-harm, drugs and abuse with some mature language. *Go check out the sequel But Why Not

"they told us that we needed therapy, as if medication and tainted words could fix broken toys."

A young woman who was always the life of the party, quick to tell a joke, always smiling and happy, tragically dies at age 23. What her mother found after her death reflected a much different young woman, her poetry. Her words showed a young woman crying out to feel loved, wanted, beautiful and worthy. Struggling to accept herself as the wonderful, happy, beautiful young woman everyone else saw her as. Her words reflect the pain and torment she allowed another to cause her. It is her mother's most heart felt desire to reach even one young person struggling to accept themselves. To encourage them to open up and talk to someone, to know they are never alone, to know their feelings are validated. She also hopes to reach a mother that perhaps feels her daughter is perfect and completely in charge of her life, as mothers often do. After reading her poetry, hopefully it will facilitate conversation, confirm unconditional love and help to end words that a mother never hears. I am her mother and these are her words.

"I think you should -" "Correction: I am in my own body, with my own mind; you do not and cannot tell me what to do."

What has pushed you to believe taking your life is the answer? Are you really going to do it? What happens when death isn't as peaceful as you expected? What if a Reaper gives you something of an ultimatum? Witness first-hand what your death has brought to those around you, or remain wandering as a lost soul until you reach the point of insanity. "You can take your life, but what about the people around you? Aren't you taking theirs too?" Emily nearly laughed again, the idea was so ridiculous, but when she went to answer... she found she couldn't respond. What happens to them? ____________________ Author's Note: If you're looking for a sign not to kill yourself, this is it. [The Fighter's Series - Book 1] Formerly titled: Emily's Suicide Highest Ranking: #1 Paranormal