Highest Rank- 3 in Humor ***************************** "I am sorry sir, may I know what the problem is?" "Problem? You want to know what my problem is? I told the waiter to put a ring in my girlfriend's chicken salad so that I could propose her and your chef put it so deep in the salad that she ate it!", he yelled. If the ring is in her stomach, she needs to go to the hospital as soon as possible. What if Maera dies, she was choking sitting on the chair. "Nathan, you need to take her to the hospital right now!" "Eh? But won't it digest in the stomach?", he asked confused. "Platinum or silver will cause her heath hazard, idiot", I explained it to him. "Not even onion rings?", he asked with a smirk. *********** Sky without middle name or surname is more lost than before . She was found unconscious near rock in the never-ending sea by millionaire family of Blacks who were having family time. Sarah and Richard Black were kind enough not only take her to hospital but also take her into their family when they learnt she had no memory of her past life. Fast forward to year and a half and boom, their son and Sky are engaged where their so called son, Nathan Black hates her guts. And then enters the hero slash villain slash lover slash nightmare of Sky's old life, Drew . Reverse back to the time before Sky was found. Or can I say Moon Davis , an orphan who fell in love with Drew Blackwood in her college and was left heartbroken for no apparent fault of her's which in a way costed her memory to vanish . Was Drew so blind to see what he actually wanted , or did he realize whom he really loved when it was too late. Let's walk through the memory lane of sweet and sarcastic Sky's life and kick some asses OR first kick his ass and then fall in love.

Dear Reader, It hadn't hit me right away, many things, but especially the fact that I was about to turn twenty years old. It was as if it was just yesterday that I was learning how to make a peanut butter sandwiches, tie my shoes, and draw endlessly with fat crayons--which I thoroughly believed to be a masterpiece. It had to be yesterday, when I was befriending any new person that I met with a dazzling smile. No, those were the years that I was numb--masked from the world and blissfully unaware of the dangers and lingering dark edges of the Chicago city. Life moves fast; terrifyingly fast for some, especially those who try and anchor down each and every day of their existence. For others, it moves drearily slow. I use to be numb, I use to be unaware of the shadows deep within the corners of the earth, the watchful figures around me. I use to draw scribbles, struggle to tie my shoes, and fail at doing the simple things, like tying shoes. I use to make friends with anyone I met and kept that friendship over a promise. I use to do a lot of things, actually. But that was when life was a whole lot simpler, safer, and perfect. That was before I knew about Death. That was before he became my frenemy. Forever and always, Faith Williams *** MY WRITING PAGE! Please join! http://www.facebook.com/pages/Kat-aka-katrocks247-from-Wattpad/208740202517075

As of September 17th, 2024, DEATH IS MY RIDE OR DIE IS PUBLISHED! WOO-HOO!!!!! It is now available in bookstores and everywhere books are sold. The fiery sequel to Death Is My BFF Rewritten and 2016 WATTY AWARDS winner... The book you should read before this one is "Death is My BFF Rewritten (book 1) on my profile! <3 *** BOOK BLURB: To capture a creature who threatens the balance between good and evil, Faith Williams is forced to team up with her sexy and psycho "friend", the Angel of Death. * * * Connect with other Death fans in the Facebook group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/308207282529485/ Connect with me on Twitter, Instagram, and Snapchat: @Katrocks247

Death is ready to visit a new world! Based on the published novel and Wattpad sensation, Death is My BFF is now a webcomic! Experience the story like never before now only on WEBTOON! This is a VERY rough, early draft of "Death is My BFF" and the published version looks very different! :) ****** (2014 WATTY AWARD WINNER!) The legendary Angel of Death has spared Faith Williams' divine soul. However, this merciful act comes at a price. When she turns eighteen, her soul and everything that she is, will belong to him. The problem? Faith's not going to hell without a fight. Death isn't the only creature that has taken notice in her uniqueness. Demons, monsters, one vengeful demi-god, and a notorious playboy are all wrecking havoc on her life. Torn between two worlds, Faith must decide once and for all whom she can trust, and whom she can allow herself to love, before all of hell breaks loose. Even if it means striking another deal with Death. * * * FAQ: HELLO, YOU BEAUTIFUL PERSON! :) You CAN read this story without reading the Original Death series. DEATH IS MY BFF REWRITTEN is a total rewrite of the first draft of "Death is My BFF", which I wrote when I was 14. The ORIGINAL series is on my profile, but it does not line up with this book. Again, the book you are currently on is "Death is My BFF Rewritten," which is part of the Rewritten Death Chronicles, and this book does not line up with the original Death series. Again, the Rewritten Death Chronicles will share similarities to the original series, but should be considered a SEPARATE from the series I wrote when I was 14! Please enjoy!!!!! Xoxo, Katarina E. Tonks * * * JOIN THE FACEBOOK GROUP FOR THE DEATH SERIES!!! (Thank me later!!! LOL.) https://www.facebook.com/groups/308207282529485/

"You're the only thing that I have ever truly loved," he states, leaning in closer. I try to scoot away, but he corners me on the bed, placing his body over mine. "Get off me!" I exclaim, angrily. "I'm not who you think I am. That can't be possible." His face comes closer to mine as he pins my wrists to the bed. "It is possible. I loved you for three, short, human years, and then you left me. Now that I have you back, though, I will never let that happen again." ***** Salem's earliest memories were of her parents preforming odd rituals. She never really understood anything they said in them, but she would always sit in the middle of the big, circled, star and giggle. At age 10, both of her parents died. She was thrown into foster care. Without them around to explain to her exactly what the rituals meant, Salem was never told that she was a sacrifice to a demon king in exchange for all the money they could ever ask for. On her 20th birthday, at the stroke of midnight, the demon king finally comes for her. She is completely unaware of the situation, and she begins to try her best at resisting his advances, but he is very possessive, very persuasive, and very determined to claim what is rightfully his.

----- In serious need of revision! ----- Wanna-be journalist Kate Santoro would do anything for the scoop. Anything. Including finding her way into an underground club exclusive to only those in the Genovese mafia and the beautiful women they employee. What could be more perfect? She would stick to the shadows, snap a few videos, and write the biggest story New York has ever seen, therein making her a legend! Easy as pie. Until she gets found. A series of blatant lies and lucky breaks later and she is mistaken to be one of the workers underneath. While many might be terrified of this predicament Kate couldn't be more excited. The freedom to roam the area and talk to the members of the infamous brotherhood will leave no rock unturned. All she has to do is keep her cover until the night is over and the workers go home. What a fantastic position she is in! There are just two problems. One being him. Alessio. The Don, the Godfather, the Capo di tutti capi (the boss of bosses) who has taken a keen interest in Kate. Even that is something she could probably handle for one night. Except problem number two. They don't leave. Not at the end of the night, the end of the week, or even the end of the month. Alessio's interest in Kate threatens to expose her, something she would surely die from. He knows she doesn't belong but it's not as though she could have just waltzed in, right? By the time Kate realizes that not even the greatest scoop is worth the price, she is in far too deep to call it quits now. ~~~Praise for When The Sun Goes Down~~~ Natasha427: "It was so captivating that I may or may not have spent the last several hours holed up in my room frantically scrolling down to read more. I LOVED IT!" uninteresting17: "You're my soulmate. I love just everything about your writing." Daisy_Blue: "Has anyone seen my heart? It seems to have been ripped out and tossed across the ocean." NaughtyPlease: "I am beyond obsessed with this piece of literature heaven!!!"

Lexie Greene has always had such a pretty face. Unfortunately, that's where it seemed to stop. She's grown up hearing her Mother constantly remind her that she needs to lose weight. And twenty-two-year-old Lexie knows she's overweight. With her younger sister's wedding on the horizon and a crush to stalk on Facebook, Lexie's had enough. She gives up her constant daydreams about food and joins a dieting group. As the pounds melt away at the gym, she finds that life on the other side of junk food isn't what she thought. Bon Bons to Yoga Pants is an inspirational hit about a girl coming to terms with herself, and her past, all while navigating a world of food and fitness.

In the desert, an instant turns life into death and hate into love. In the desert, everything is different. Boundaries break down, and you find yourself doing things that you would never, ever have imagined. Lilly Linton finds this out the hard way: in the shadow of the pyramids, she and her boss, cold, calculating Mr Ambrose, must face death and danger together. Is the desert's heat enough to melt the cold heart of Britain's richest financier? WINNER of the PEOPLE'S CHOICE AWARD in the Wattys 2016 Sequel to Robert Thier's #1 Hit 'Storm and Silence'

Funny comebacks!