"Police! Open up!" I yell, banging again. I steel myself as this time I hear the locks click-clunk and see the door pull back slowly to reveal a half-naked blond bear of a man, who fucking towers over me. He's standing, blocking the doorway, with a frying pan in one hand and an aerosol can in the other. His face is flushed, his chest heaving with exertion, eyes wide with adrenaline, and his bare torso is glistening with sweat. He adjusts the grip on the pan and I see the muscles of that arm ripple underneath the monochrome sleeve that adorns it. Shit. Why the fuck did I not call for back up? (Aka the failed one shot. From the ship that sails itself.) Some content is mature. Caution advised, but specific trigger warnings will be given where appropriate. Note: AWOOGA is used to label the dirrrrrrty chapters.

Mitch takes a much-needed break from family time at Christmas to go clubbing and hopefully find a hot hookup. He wakes up the next morning with no regrets, save one.

Scott, Mitch, and Kirstin have been born into a world of magic. They must participate in a ceremony that matches them with an animal familiar, but things don't go as expected. As they navigate the consequences of that botched ceremony, and try to accept their fate and their powerful new destiny, Scott and Mitch will also explore their feelings for each other, a whole separate kind of magic. This will be 5 short-ish parts. I hope you enjoy! Shout out to the crazily talented @GleefulChibi for the perfect cover art.

"Parallel universes may or may not exist; the case is unproved. We are going to have to live with that uncertainty." Scott once believed in those words but when his world crumbled into dust, he wanted nothing more than for them to be true - and he got his wish granted. *** "You'll always be mine... Mitch Hoying. Here and whatever comes after. Just wait for me on the other side, ok? I'll always find you. "

Just some One Shots updated randomly, whenever I get the inspiration.

Hello again my friends, and welcome to my latest long-format story. This one is gonna be a bit different. It is very very VERY AU, so just go with it as it's set in a fictional world and time. It hopefully goes without saying that this is 1000% fiction and anything here about real people is just a story and doesn't necessarily represent them or even my opinion of them. Cool? Okay. Credit for that insane book cover goes to the incredibly talented @Eliak22. I gave her one pic and half of an idea and she completely nailed it. My plan is to showcase her and other artists throughout the story, so be on the lookout for that. I expect this will be a fair bit smuttier than my other long stories, for those of your thirsty folk. But it definitely does have plot for those of you that skim the other stuff. I won't put warnings up cuz it's just not my style, haha. Also, Scomavilex. You're welcome.

This was originally posted on AO3 on New Year's Eve 2015. fictionalcandie's notes: All blame for the conception of this fic goes to duvalu. All I did was write, uh, a few words to go with it. Everybody shout out to her for doing real actual writing for the first time in years, though!! So proud of her. ♥ duvalu's notes: "A few words" = 98% of this including all the good bits, because fictionalcandie is the best and does stuff like this for me despite not even really being in this fandom. <3 Super fun to write and I love what we ended up with. (Oh yeah and while this is fiction and not at all reality? If you're here because you googled yourself or someone you know, please do us all a favour and back away slowly.)

~~~ God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. ~~~ "We can do it. We're strong enough, our - our love is enough, right?" "Our love will always be enough."

Hello!! This is Volume Four of my Marble and BlackStar series. If you haven't already, please go read Captives, then Room With a View, and The Ties That Bind. Thank you for your patience--I know I'm not the fastest at updates, but I hope you'll think it's worth the wait. Stars and comments make my day, so leave me some love if you enjoy it!

This is by request from my dear friends Bat Girl and Blondie. I hope they approve. This is 1000% fiction.