SIREN is a novel about six people from around the world selected by the UN to investigate a strange musical transmission emanating from Neptune's orbit. They're given a spaceship with cutting edge technology, placed into an induced coma, and expected to report back in three years time. But when the awakened crew arrives at the origin of the transmission, their electronics malfunction and they're driven through the Kuiper Belt. With their engines ruined, oxygen supplies dwindling and one of the team members suffering from hypoxia, time is of the essence for the troubled squad. Their situation grows ever more tense when Tommy Fletcher discovers three alien ships watching their every move. Tommy Fletcher, the protagonist of SIREN, is the resident linguistics expert who over-thinks, second-guesses and has a habit of biting his nails. He may be in his late twenties, but Tommy's ceaseless trepidation makes the rest of the hardened crew feel like he's fragile and witless. Will the chaotic events happening around Tommy break his brittle will, or can he shed his hesitant demeanour and become a hero?

Sick of cliché Wattpad books? Then this isn't the book for you. We take every single over-used plot, character and trope on Wattpad - from player-meets-nerd to my-boyfriend-is-a-vampire - and mash it all into one, awful, hilarious parody. NOTE: This is a parody. Characters have not been created to mock a race/nationality/sexuality, they have been created to lightly poke fun at the way certain teen fiction writers reduce them into crude stereotypes. Thanks for helping this pile of junk get to #1 in Humor!

"Ethan." Aiden pauses. "I want you." He softly bites my ear. "I want to kiss you more than you will ever know." Trying to avoid the daily beatings of the school bully can be challenging. But what happens if the schools bully has a crush on you?

❝I think you're more of a goddamn female than I am, James.❞ | ❝Pfft, don't you know? The only thing straighter than me is my parking, Janice.❞ | Copyright © 2015 Sarena Akhter. All Rights Reserved.

*****WATTYS 2015 WINNER!***** WATTPAD STAFF PICK (9/7/15) In the end, the robots win. But you already knew that. "Everyone Died + My iPhone Stopped Working" is a collection of short interviews with some of the survivors. People who have tremendous insight into the rise of Artificially Intelligent machines or, more often, don't. Why did the robots rise up? What did they want? Why couldn't they be stopped? Can they be stopped now? Is humanity doomed? And what the f--k is going on with the squirrels? You will get the answers to all of these questions. Or some of these questions. Or none of these questions. We'll see. I will be updating this once a week until I run out of stuff that I find funny. Then I'm done. Cover art courtesy of the hilarious and ridiculously talented Dave Pressler. (http://www.davepresslerart.com)