For months Summer is trapped in a cellar with the man who took her - and three other girls: Rose, Poppy, and Violet. His perfect, pure flowers. His family. But flowers can't survive long cut off from the sun, and time is running out...

They're worlds apart, and this isn't high school, so how the hell did a homeless female writer end up renting a billionaire's mansion? And - hold your breath - becoming his fake girlfriend? ➳ full blurb inside ➳ first reached #1 in humor on july 6, 2015 ➳ first reached #1 in business on august 29, 2023 ➳ winner of best humor book in the fiction awards 2016 ➳ featured by cadbury (marvellous creations) and secret lives of the americans (pivot) P.S. This is a SATIRICAL BILDUNGSROMAN. Proceed with caution. (cover by @glueeater)

[This book has officially been published and only a sample remains. See inside for details.] Nora Montgomery's primary goal was to remain seemingly unnoticed until graduation, and that meant staying away from Ryder Collins. But when both she and Ryder are selected to participate in the local police department's handcuff demonstration, they find themselves inescapably chained together. The tension between them is thick; filled with unresolved issues from their past friendship. But things get a whole lot worse when the officer loses the key and the pair are forced to accommodate each other until a replacement is available. Being handcuffed to the opposite gender was sure to introduce some extremely uncomfortable situations. Things are about to get awkward, right? 2013 Watty Awards Winner Most Popular, Mystery//Thriller

Samantha Peterson has wealthy parents. Her so called friends not only murder her parents, but rob them and become wealthy themselves and soon the richest people in the country as they built off this stolen wealth. Three years after this , Samantha returns for revenge. Not just any revenge. She has changed her appearance and name. Samantha Peterson is gone and now in her place is Victoria Strickings. Alexander Celeste. A man who shares the same hatred towards her main evildoer, Marcus Williams aids Victoria in her fight to regain what was hers. And hell. They might have succeeded. [Highest Ranking; #1 Action #1 Mystery/thriller]

If you're judging this book by its cover and title, you're already proving the point this story wants to make. Try to move past this satirical obstacle in front of you. This is a story about bullying, and like the hundreds of other books on the topic, it will show you the harsh reality of being discriminated, belittled, ridiculed for something you cannot control- how you look, who you love, or what you believe in. But unlike these books, this story's sole purpose is not to tear your heart out of your chest as you mourn over your loss of faith in humanity. Instead, this book will make you laugh and love alongside these characters. Just like in life, there will be moments of dread and surrender, but there will also be moments of happiness, laughter, and love. - Naomi Lorraine, better known as Nerdy Naomi with her thick-rimmed glasses and straight-A report card, is the most unpopular girl in her school. Even with the help of her sarcastic comebacks, that doesn't stop her from getting bullied by everyone in Dartwell High. Every day her childhood bully, Raymond Meyers, knocks her off her feet, literally. However, she can't do anything but survive the laughs, insults, and bruises high school gives her. There are three senior transfer students, dubbed the Three Musketeers: Bennett Frazier, Jordan Wallace, and Declan Lynch. All in one day, Naomi catches their attention one by one. With her snarky attitude, but innocent look, they can't help but want her. But not the way you're thinking. Oh no, not like that. Instead, it's probably the whole opposite. It's quite simple really. She'll be their good girl. And they'll be her bad boys. ~ [This story is a first draft written by a 13 to 15-year-old girl so it has its fair share of grammar mistakes and plot holes.] Wattys 2015 Talk of the Town Award Second Place Story of 2015 Best Humor and Overall Points of The Fiction Awards 2016 Third in the Writers Awards 2016 Highest Ranks: #1 Humor, #1 Teen Fiction

CURRENTLY IN THE PROCESS OF BEING REWRITTEN!

“Well hey there, at least buy me dinner first.” I could feel Aaron's eyes burning through the back of my head as he stared down at me. Down. Towards his crotch. I was face to crotch with Aaron Cross. --- Life is full of Awkward moments; unfortunately for Blake Miller, her life is just one big Awkward moment. From being named Blake because her parents were expecting a boy, to walking in on her dad "wrestling" with her mother's sister. But when Blake's house gets damaged from a hazardous flood and they tear her house down brick by brick when they find a severe mold infestation, her life is about to pass the level of Awkward when they move in with her mom's current boyfriend and his insufferable son who just so happens to be her school's notorious star player -- and not just in sports. Blake's situation probably wouldn't be so bad if there wasn't a history between the two, and she will soon realize that not only will her past reveal itself, but so will the secrets kept hidden around her. [DISCLAIMER: i am aware that wattpad changed the rating to rated R, but that's only because of the excessive amount of swearing from the characters. other than that, this book contains mostly PG-13 material.] [humor #13 - 04/11/15]

Highest Rank #5 in Humour - Skye Einstein isn't your particular girl, even if she's the great grandchild of Albert Einstein. But don't let the last name fool you, she wasn't born with the intelligent nor talent gene so instead Skye possessed the speciality of staring at delicious males and drooling. Skye seems to have the great aspect of raging hormones and curiosity. Is it possible for one girl with the explicit content Rated R mind be able to get the new kid to notice her? Well frankly, no one can miss Skye as she misinterprets everything dirty and enjoys sharing her thoughts, especially her best friend Jace who is her inevitable sound board. Everything seems so good, so cliche', so inviting and yet... Nothing is what you think it is. This is one humour book that is so much more than you bargained for.