When surviving is all you've done for months, you forget how to actually live. When running is all you've done for months, you forget how to walk. When the dead is all you're used to seeing for months, you forget what a human looks like. When hating is all you've done for months, you forget how to love. Zayn Malik hates Niall Horan. Liam, Austin, Harry, and Louis weren't so bad but damn he hated Niall. All Zayn wanted to do was find his boyfriend. That's all he was trying to do. Find him and leave. But Niall looked too much like his boyfriend. Niall acted too much like his boyfriend. Niall was too much for Zayn to handle. He made Zayn wanna live a little. Love a little. But that was the problem. It was the end of the world. There was no time to live. And there sure as hell wasn't time to love.

"Did you honestly think I would't find you, Blondie?" Zayn crossed his arms. "Actually, I hoped you wouldn't.. But yeah somewhere in there." Niall says. "Sassy, are we?" Zayn put on and amused smirk. "Zayn, you can't get away with it this time. I have friends. They'll report me-" "But I texted them all. Saying you had to go see your mum in an institution." Zayn smirks. "How long have you been watching me?!" "Long enough. Theres something you should know, Blondie," Zayn bends to Nialls ear, "No escaping this time. Im your worst nightmare and your wildest dream."

Some fear the dark. Some fear clowns. Some fear monsters. But thats the things we learn to grow out of. There is one thing you can fear for the rest of your life- well- someone. Zayn Malik is a twenty-five year old who has a very, very special job that makes him a lot of money. He's a hitman. You know, people pay him to kill someone they want dead. He loved himself but hated his life. He was never happy. He was grouchy towards anyone and everyone. He was always pissed off. He never smiled for a good reason. There was a reason for that though. He had a rough past. He never even wanted to think about his past. But then he was found. Niall Horan was finally found. Niall had ruined Zayns entire life. Niall brought Zayn into the mess of a life he had now. He hated Niall with every bone in his body. He wanted Niall Horan dead. But Niall thinks Zayn is dead. Zayn had the most terrible plan. He would make Niall like him again and kill him. He would hurt Niall in so many different ways. He would make sure Niall would suffer. He would kill Niall fucking Horan. Because eight years ago, Niall Horan, his boyfriend, tried to kill him.

It's the little things you're supposed to enjoy. When the sky is any color but blue or when the sun shines. But Zayn Malik... He didn't enjoy anything. Hell, he was going to die one day so why the hell get your hopes up? Zayn just didn't care about his life. He wasted it on drugs, sex, alcohol, and bumming money of his friends. But it seems to be the complete opposite for Niall Horan. Zayn didn't get the fucking idiot, maybe that's why Zayn enjoyed his presence. Niall loved everything. Every little thing. The silent beat of a butterfly's wings made his day. Zayn just didn't get him at all. But Niall got Zayn. He knew what Zayn felt and Niall knew that Zayn could be helped. But maybe Zayn wanted help. Zayn never really knew someone so happy could have such a horrible life like Niall. Maybe somewhere in there is when they fell in love. Maybe that's when Zayn can finally learn to enjoy the simplest things. Like the silent beat of a butterfly's wings.

maybe it was the feeling of his hips grinding on top of his. maybe it was the feeling of their bodies molded together. maybe it was the feeling of Zayn deep inside of him. maybe it was the feeling of having something that would always take the pain away. but niall knew he was screwed when he kept coming back for more. and Zayn knew he was screwed when he kept letting him.