They're worlds apart, and this isn't high school, so how the hell did a homeless female writer end up renting a billionaire's mansion? And - hold your breath - becoming his fake girlfriend? ➳ full blurb inside ➳ first reached #1 in humor on july 6, 2015 ➳ first reached #1 in business on august 29, 2023 ➳ winner of best humor book in the fiction awards 2016 ➳ featured by cadbury (marvellous creations) and secret lives of the americans (pivot) P.S. This is a SATIRICAL BILDUNGSROMAN. Proceed with caution. (cover by @glueeater)

The world as we know it ended 209 years ago. From a desert wasteland springs a single kingdom, ruled by a tyrannical King and trapped in an endless war against the shadowy desert warriors. As a desperate bid to save what remains of humanity, society has been split into two distinct classes, nicknamed the Court and the Commons. For an oppressed population on the brink of revolution, a common thief could be the last hope. Up until now, Kay has survived by her wits alone. Reckless and impulsive, wanted by the King's guard, Kay has become known as the Runner. Using the city's rooftops as her personal domain, she manages to keep one step ahead of the King with one hand buried in the purses of the courtiers. Driven by the plight of the commoners and the unjust death of her family, Kay seizes the chance to graduate from small-time thievery to full-scale rebellion. Her opportunity comes in the form of Will, a wealthy ex-soldier with a dark past. Plucked from the streets and thrown into the shimmering palace court, Kay must use her every strength to blend into a world where she doesn't belong, closer to the enemy than she ever thought she would be.

Bronte Davis is Worthington High's sweetheart. With a charismatic and loveable personality and a drive to help anyone and everyone, it's easy to understand just why everyone loves her. That is, everyone except Blake Parker; the school's rude and arrogant bad boy. But even that's not hard to understand why. While Blake is mean, cruel and egotistical, Bronte is kind, helpful and humble. So what happens when Bronte is forced to stay at Blake's house since her parents are off on a work trip around Africa? Well, with Bronte's sudden determination to befriend the arrogant Bad Boy, you can only imagine all the different possibilities. Yes, all the possibilities that involve the two ripping each other's throats out, that is. With late night conversations, ruthless pranks, constant bickering and secrets that are yet to unfold, its a miracle the two haven't killed each other... yet. Then again, opposites do attract. ▲ ▲ ▲ Cover made by @jeoneunkiko

Kimberly Taylor was a quiet, shy girl with no friends growing up, until Kindergarten when Asher Knight changed that. It's now been eleven years since they've become best friends, and they both have come a long way. Asher Knight has become one of Jefferson High's players and all-star jock. Popular, good looking, funny, and an expert kiss ass. Kimberly Taylor is an intelligent and hard working girl, opposite of Asher's popular status. With average looks to cover her extreme case of nerd. With the two being such close friend, will the cost of being best friends with Asher be her love life? Will Asher lose over a decade of friendship to Spencer Grey? Will Kimmy stand up and finally tell Asher the truth? It's a tough yet fun ride being Best Friends with the Player.

Sophie Allen is a Pre-Med student, a hard worker, and head over heels in love with her long-time boyfriend, Bryce Harrison. Bryce Harrison is a baseball jock, a lover of the movie Hairspray, and head over heels in love with his long-tie girlfriend, Sophie Allen. That is, until Bryce's world is turned upside down with the big-C. A cancer diagnosis. What does it mean to love someone unconditionally? And just how far would you go for the person that you love? Sophie is about to find out.

Lucille is 17 years old. She does not have many friends. She's always been by herself since she had a hard time making friends. Ethan is also 17 years old. He is one of the most popular guys at school. He is the head of his baseball team. Boys admire him. And girls drool over his perfect looks. One night Ethan saves Lucille from a robbery. From there, one crazy decision made by the two to become "friends with benefits" leads to an endless, hot romance that's full of tears and untold feelings.

Conner Rogers: Hot, athletic, and popular, with an ego the size of the Empire State Building. Selena Rider: Clumsy, uncoordinated-and-most-definitely-not-athletic, and sarcastic, with an unfortunate affinity for making self destructive life decisions. Against all odds, Selena and Conner have remained best friends longer than either can even recall, joined at the hip and constantly searching for adventure. Or trouble. Or both. Until puberty kicks in, and BAM!, they go from being best friends for life, to best friends with benefits. No one else knows, for now anyways, and keeping it that way will prove more of a challenge than expected. The two will have to deal with the fact, that the things they want, are sometimes the things that they never expected to want. There's a test of devotion and friendship approaching them, and no one is certain that they will make it out with their hearts in one piece. After all, best friends are forever. Right? UNDER MASSIVE CONSTRUCTION! So if things aren't making any sense, it's because I've been going back and editing everything XD